First Trimester + Morning Sickness Survival

I am by no means an expert on all things pregnancy, but I do feel like I have a good handle on the first trimester. And by that, I mean, I've suffered through pretty brutal morning sickness on four separate occasions. Of course I don't know how to CURE it, but I have developed some tactics that make weeks 5 through 13 at least a bit more bearable. I don't think these will work for everyone. But I figure if you haven't tried some of these things, they may be worth trying.

Accept that you may feel really sick. I would say the vast majority of my friends haven't had terrible morning sickness. And this makes vomiting several times a day feel very isolating. You feel like you won some sort of awful lottery. I found when I felt sorry for myself or dwelled on others' good fortune that I would feel much worse. Getting out and about and trying to power through actually helped. Some people get sick. Some people don't. Some people get only mild sickness. There's such a range of normal.

My morning sickness tricks:

• Mix water with lemonade (I got the Newman's Own Organic kind). I couldn't stomach plain water this time around. And the lemonade helped my nausea.
• Take gum everywhere you go. Or hard candy. Find SOMEthing that helps take the edge off when you hit  wave. There's nothing universal that works.
• Consider carrying a plastic grocery bag in your purse or diaper bag for emergencies. Yes. I've puked in my car on several occasions.
• Lay down as often as possible. I realize if you work FT this isn't easy. I used to take short naps in my office at work when I was pregnant with Ada. This time around, I laid on the couch -- puke bucket nearby -- while Eloise roamed around the living room. I gated everything off so it was safe and would rotate toys every few days. I'd play with her from my post and it's surprising how much you can interact this way! 
• Eat what tastes good when you can. I see all these "HOW TO EAT THE BEST FOR PREGNANCY" advertisements on my Facebook lately. Dude, that stuff makes me feel HORRIBLE. I tried so hard to keep eating vegetables and other healthy things in the first trimester and all I ended up doing was throwing up. So, getting some food town trumps throwing up healthy food. Now that I'm in the second trimester, I've replaced all carbs with lots of healthy stuff. But seriously, don't put the pressure on yourself. Your baby is getting a lot from your nutritional stores and your multivitamin.
• Consider skipping your vitamin for a while. Yeah. This sounds counterintuitive, but I did switch to gummy vitamins without iron with Ada and Eloise's pregnancies. This time around since I know have the MTHFR mutation, I skipped vitamins and continued taking only vitamin D and a special methyl-friendly folate supplement. I'd take the full vitamin regimen when I could stomach it. And now I'm fully back on it at 14 weeks.
• Don't spend too much money on gimmicks. There are probiotics that claim to help. Sea Bands, which do NOTHING for me. Special morning sickness candies, teas, etc. None of this stuff has worked for me. I guess it's worth a try, but don't go broke.

Don't ignore symptoms or think everything you feel is pregnancy related. When I was pregnant with Eloise, I was peeing every five seconds in small amounts. I had a lot of pain and pelvic pressure. I figured it was just due to being pregnant. It went on for weeks and I finally decided to speak up. Come to find out, it's not normal to always feel miserable in the first trimester. And I ended up having group B strep UTIs my entire pregnancy. This time around, I have absolutely nothing like that going on. So, if you don't feel well or think something's amiss, chat with your doctor sooner rather than later.

B6 + Unisom under your doctor's guidance. I'll be completely honest that I don't feel this was the miracle cure for me. That said, the Unisom in particular really helped me get to sleep at night and take the edge off my exhaustion during the day. I found when I was less tired, I was also less nauseous. Your doctor can give you guidelines for how many milligrams to take and when. I have seen several approaches. I took a whole tab of Unisom at night with 25 milligrams of B6.

Let your child watch a little a lot of TV. I know there are differing views on this, but to survive, there were weeks when Eloise and Ada watched a lot of TV. If I felt well, I'd try to make the most of it. But in the scheme of life . . . I don't think several weeks of television is going to make or break my kids. Here's a list of Extra Gentle TV Shows for Toddlers/Preschoolers if you need suggestions. We watched Sesame Street on Hulu, and I think it's a great show.

Exercise when you can. I found that continuing with exercise really helped me feel like I was still human. It's been different in every pregnancy, though. With Ada, I had nothing else going on so I could run whenever I wanted and rest whenever I wanted. With Eloise, Ada was in preschool and working out in the mornings often felt the best -- so it was easy. This time around, it was ROUGH. Winter was super long and that meant that stroller running was out of the question. I still was able to keep up with about 12 miles of running each week and some 30 minute sessions of YouTube Barre or yoga sprinkled in. I usually get this hour-long high after working out and my nausea would temporarily subside, so I'd take full advantage and try to eat something good-ish.

Make a count-down calendar. Since this wasn't my first pregnancy, I sort of knew that my nausea tends to subside around 13-14 weeks. I still get bouts of it from time to time, but it's been strangely similar each time. So, I made a paper calendar where I would physically cross off the days as I got closer to the second trimester. It felt overwhelming in the first weeks, but after a while it really helped to see that it would be over soon.

Have your partner cook as much as possible, etc. For me, this wasn't really possible because of track season. Even talking about food for several weeks would get me dry-heaving. So, whenever Stephen was home for dinner -- he knew he was cooking it. Otherwise, I stocked up on lots of healthy heat-up options like organic, low-sodium soups, Mac + cheese (that I'd do with frozen veggies), whole grain toaster waffles, and other really quick meals that required like no prep and no interaction with the food. It sounds awful saying I didn't cook for my kids for that long, but I seriously just couldn't. We got into a good groove, though. Whole fruit does wonders in a pinch.

Ask for help. I flat out begged my parents to come hang out with me on long days when it was really bad. I mean, they wanted to visit anyway, so it was a win-win. But if you face really long days alone with kids when you have bad morning sickness, take offers from friends or family to watch your kids or just help out. It feels weird at first, but it can do wonders just having a little support.

Remember: You're doing the best you can. It's easy to go hard on yourself for not doing lots of Pinterest art projects, cooking expert meals, or being like an A+ mom in all regards. But you're pregnant and likely feeling quite awful. It will end -- hopefully soon. Again, this is a blip on the radar of your entire life. Most likely, your kids won't remember you having to check out temporarily. Do what you need to do to survive.

Also: Revel in the times when you thrive -- and try not to worry that means something is wrong with the baby. If you feel well, try to eat something or get some exercise. Enjoy those moments of relief. Take it from me, I was wickedly ill and still miscarried . . . so I do not believe that morning sickness strength is always the indicator of a healthy pregnancy. And the reverse, then, would also not mean that having no morning sickness means something is wrong.

Do you have any tips to share? 

* Image source

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Big Sister

As you may have gathered from my latest Instagram post, we told Ada she’s going to be a big sister!

I’m 12 weeks and 4 days today, and I had my NT scan yesterday. But first I’ll back up to my 12 week appointment with my midwife. I had some concerns about being on antibiotics and a few questions about the group B strep, so we moved my appointment a bit earlier. We got to hear the heartbeat on the Doppler, and it was beating away at 168 beats per minute.

One big bit of TMI news is that my retroverted uterus has finally flipped into the “correct” position. So, as I had mentioned a few times, my cervix is now up and way out of reach when it had been extremely low. I’m sharing this because having a retroverted uterus -- while not entirely rare or concerning -- can lead to some complications if it doesn’t right itself. It’s just another thing women worry about, but in the vast majority of situations, everything will be just fine.

So, my NT scan. I didn’t get this screening with Ada. I was only 27 when I was pregnant with her, we had no problem getting pregnant, we don’t have a strong family history of genetic disorders (that we know about), etc. Still, this time around, we still don’t 100% know why I was miscarrying. It does seem like it was a progesterone issue, but the question mark is still there. And after Ada’s brain surgery, we just thought getting some additional testing might help us prepare for anything we’re up against.

We won’t get the final results for some time, but the scan portion of the test went very well. Everything measured in normal ranges and there weren’t markers for anything off the bat. I did have to give blood in the lab and will have another round of blood work before I get my results (at least I think that’s how it works). Has anyone had this test? What is your experience? I suppose if anything comes back abnormal, I can go on to have further testing.

Anyway, the baby was kicking up a storm in there. I couldn’t believe how big he/she has gotten. The heart rate was again 168 beats per minute (very consistent!) and everything measured right on for my due date on June 26th. The tech showed us the developing brain, the faint outline of the chambers of the heart, the fingers and toes, and all sorts of physical features.

When I was pregnant with Ada, I wasn’t terribly concerned with the sex of the baby. This time around, I really want to know what we’re having -- but not for the reason you might suspect. We absolutely, positively don’t have a preference either way. And I couldn’t mean that with any more truth in my heart. I so badly want a healthy baby. But, on the flip side, I would love to know what we’re having because I’ve had tremendous trouble bonding with the baby. It’s taken me a long time to really feel confident that the pregnancy will continue, that everything will be OK, and that’s kept me from connecting.

For example, I’ve shared very publicly that we’re pregnant online. But in “real life” I get uncomfortable talking about it!

The tech did offer a preliminary guess based on that whole “nub theory” you might have read about on birth boards. Our baby’s nub is pointing straight out, parallel with the spine, which may mean girl. It’s an early guess, but even having that discussion helped me feel like this is all really happening.

I may do more pregnancy updates from this point forward. In a way, I feel like writing little notes will help me with the whole bonding thing. I’ve had trouble celebrating because I keep feeling like something bad is going to happen. And we’re not ever going to be in the clear. So much can happen during pregnancy, birth, after birth, and beyond. That’s life -- but I also think I need to try to let go of that fear and enjoy the ride.

For now, I’ve taken a few baby steps. I’m looking up some gear since much of what we had with Ada is worn or expired. We actually did buy a crib already, which I felt really conflicted about at the time . . . but it was a good deal. I’ve also asked Santa for a Doppler so I can listen to the heart beat from home. I know it can also create some anxiety, but I’m the type of person who will probably stress either way!

Also: The story with telling Ada really isn’t as exciting as you’d think.

I wrapped up a few baby things in a box and at the bottom had a shirt that said “THE BEST BIG SISTER!” I also bought a couple books, including Baby on the Way by Martha + William Sears -- I highly recommend this one because it mentions midwives and nursing, etc. We told her the news, and she didn’t have much of a reaction. Like, at all. I think she’s a little confused because baby has been in the vocabulary for so long with nothing to show for it.


But as the day went on, she got more and more excited. She asked lots of questions and even wanted to “watch a movie with the baby in mommy’s belly.”

I could write a load more, but I think I’ll stop here. Thank you for all your love and support as we’ve gone through all the highs and lows in this journey. We still have a long way to go, but we’re ready to fully embrace the positives.

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Training for a Half Marathon (Or Other Race) Pregnant

I had been training for a local half marathon race since the month before we got our positive test. I never expected to see those two pink lines so soon, and the running dork in me immediately thought about the race. OK. Back up. AFTER the shock wore off and I thought about the tiny poppy seed growing inside of me -- THEN I thought about the race.

Priorities here!

Still, once my mind cleared, I wondered: Would I still be able to participate? And is running 13.1 miles around 12 weeks a good idea?

I got lots of opinions on the matter from family, friends, and even online pregnancy boards. After becoming increasingly frustrated with the wildly varying responses (from a firm "HELL NO. That's so selfish!" to "Yeah -- and you can even race the whole thing. Go for a PR!"), I decided to listen to myself and my body. Oh, yeah. And my midwife.

Here's how I progressed toward my goal in the early weeks. Keep in mind this is my personal experience and tips that worked for me. Every pregnancy is different.

1.) I checked with my healthcare provider before getting too intense. I kept running light and fun until my first appointment at around 7 weeks. Before that point, I continued the mileage I was already doing -- and no more. I ran at a slower pace (to keep my heart rate lower) and made sure to keep myself well hydrated. In the early weeks, I didn't feel any different -- sickness hadn't settled in and my energy levels were still high.

Then, at my first appointment, I told my midwife about my goal. I told her the specific date of the race and how far along I'd be. I gave her details about my running history (which included running the distance many, many times within the past three years) and how my running had been since we found out. She was supportive, but also cautious. We agreed I could continue training if I kept it light and relaxed. She emphasized that I should listen to my body, but that if I had been active before pregnancy, she saw no reason that I couldn't continue what I was doing.

***It's important to note that I had run several recent 12-milers before I got pregnant. I had also come off a long season of marathon mileage. So, the distance was well within my reach. If you've never run a half marathon before or your distance isn't at least to a comfortable 10 miles, you may want to stick with shorter races.

2.) I threw my expectations out the window. My goal was to complete the run, not to smash a time goal at the race. That way, I could train without putting any pressure on myself. I didn't wear a watch on any of my runs. I even had to stop back at the house on the longer runs to pee, eat, and drink (in that order). Time didn't stop when I did, and I knew that stopping during the race was a real possibility -- one I needed to get used to. Why worry about the clock ticking?

At first, it was difficult to change my view of running. Though I'm relatively laid-back, I always have some sort of goal pace in mind. I am somewhat competitive, too. But running pregnant had to be different (I wrote more about that in our first preggo running post). At times, I felt like I wasn't moving forward. Like each mile took FOREVER. Slowly -- quite literally -- I began to soak in my surroundings. I began to appreciate that I could still run and move my body. Running became a relaxing mental break. Time to think.

The mental shift was so important, but not easy. I still struggle with it. However, I keep reminding myself that this step-back is temporary. I will work to regain my "usual" self and my "usual" times after the baby arrives. I have my whole life to run and only 9 months to grow this sweet baby.

3.) I modified my usual training schedule. Typically when I get ready for races, I run 5 to 6 days a week. After I found out I was pregnant, my body somehow told me I only needed to run 3 to 4 days a week. How did I know? In time, I just felt . . . tired. Especially after Sunday long runs. I needed more recovery. When I ran 3 to 4 days a week -- a short, mid-length, and long run -- I felt great.

Remember: During pregnancy, the body is dealing with WAY more than training. Those early bedtimes and mid-afternoon yawns are because a human is growing. That's serious, serious stuff.

I changed my long run build-up, too. Instead of building the mileage by running progressively longer, longer, then stepping back (like in Hal Higdon's plans), I ran a long run, say -- 10 miles, and the next week would do between 6 and 8. The next week, I'd do maybe 11. Then another 6 or 8. The next week, 10 again. The longest I ran before the race was (a ssslow) 11 miles the week before lining up at the start.


4.) If I felt particularly sick or tired, I'd skip that day. Or move the workout entirely. I did find, though, that running often helped my "morning" sickness quite a bit. Especially those short runs between 3 and 4 miles. Along with listening to how I was feeling -- I had to accept that I might be too sick or tired to participate in the event. I'll write more about this in another post.

The key: I had to keep my goal loose to eliminate disappointment.

There were some days when I had cramping and other strange pains (just during the day, not while running). These sensations are normal in early pregnancy and usually indicate that the uterus is expanding with the growing baby. However, on days when I had more pain than others, I took a walk around the neighborhood versus a jog.

Overall, I let my minute-by-minute condition dictate my schedule. Sometimes that meant giving up for a walk. Sometimes that meant giving up for a night resting on the couch. In the end, I was able to run the race and feel great doing it. If I hadn't taken care of myself, I'm not sure I could have completed it.

5.) I tested out my new racing style. I ran a couple 5Ks to see what racing was like while pregnant. I highly recommend experiencing a shorter race before going for something longer. I can't even begin to describe all the differences. It was really difficult to hold myself back at first. I had to check in with my breathing every few moments. Often, I'd have to slow my pace to get comfortable again.

For those of you familiar with racing, you'll understand how the body/mind surrenders to adrenaline on race day. Learning how to get that control back is important during pregnancy. I kept reminding myself that the baby was along for the ride. He/she needed to keep calm and happy.

I had to check my pride at the start line, too. I had to stop thinking about how I could usually kick the butts of the people around me. That was probably the most difficult of all. Watching the clocks and seeing my finish times the slowest they have ever been -- humbling. On a positive note: I think running while pregnant has made me a more supportive runner. I've been able to run with a new group of people and help encourage them along the way. It's been weird . . . but also incredibly gratifying.


In our next post on this topic, I'll write more about race day. How I fueled and hydrated. The decision I had to make the morning of to run the race or not. And what it was like making my way from 0 to 13.1.

Have tips you'd like to share? Just leave a comment or email us at neverhomemaker [at] gmail [dot] com.

Pssst: Catch up on other baby-related posts at (never home)maker, baby!

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