Birth // Elective Induction

Eden was born at 39 weeks and 4 days. I scheduled her birth. No, I wasn't overdue. No, I didn't have a pressing medical concern. My birth was an elective induction. If you asked me how I feel about elective inductions before I had Ada, I would have told you that I would never, ever do such a thing. The baby should take her time -- however long that is -- and come when she's ready. I would tell you that drugs to augment labor are bad because they can lead to painful, intense contractions and, as a result, more and more interventions.

My experience with inducing birth, though, has been positive.

Twice.

But first I'll step back and explain how I came to the decision to schedule Eden's birthday.

HISTORY

It starts with my water breaking on June 14th 2016. I had been so anxious about having GBS (highly colonized with UTIs) during Eloise's pregnancy. So, I was on high lookout for my waters breaking in the final weeks of pregnancy. My water did end up breaking before contractions started. I was only dilated to a 2 and barely effaced. It was an extremely small trickle I could have easily dismissed as peeing myself. Still, I went into the hospital and was immediately hooked up to antibiotics and pitocin. My labor was considered "augmented" because my waters had ruptured on their own but nothing else happened.

That experience as it unraveled scared the heck out of me. All along I had believed that using drugs like pitocin were bad, no, HORRIBLE things. I immediately thought I'd need tons of pain medication or I'd end up with a c-section due to the baby being in distress. Why? Well, because all the "natural" birth stuff I had read and watched basically laid out that scenario as undeniable fact. I'm not saying that these interventions DO NOT lead to unnecessary interventions, but I am trying to share that it's not the case 100 percent of the time.

In the end, I labored with Eloise through mild contractions that turned "real" (based on my experience with spontaneous labor with Ada) after about four hours. Then my body transitioned quickly from 4/5 centimeters to 10 cm and pushing, with the pushing stage being really quick. And no pain meds or epidural were necessary. While the contractions were definitely intense, I found them not much worse than my "natural" ones with Ada.

REASONS

With that experience in the back of my mind, I simply had asked my doctor about his thoughts on elective induction as I got closer to my due date. He said my cervix was favorable. He said that as a third-time mom, things may go better than if I was a first-time mom. He didn't push me either way and simply said it was my choice, and he'd be happy either way.

Here were some of my own considerations. (And please keep in mind that these were MY personal reasons. You are free to completely roll your eyes or disagree with these thoughts, but keep comments civil, please.)

• We do not have family who live in our area. We tried piecing together childcare with friends, but it was tough depending on the time of day -- we were fortunate that my mother-in-law was willing to stay with us for a couple weeks in anticipation, but with nothing happening . . . help was wearing thin.
• I started having some strange medical stuff toward the end of pregnancy. Again, nothing that required me to be induced, but near-fainting spells daily, blood pressure that was raising slightly, I was barely able to eat between morning sickness and acid reflux, and my anxiety was raising. I tend to develop keen anxiety during pregnancy since my losses, but as time went on, I became convinced something bad would happen the longer we waited.
• My labors and deliveries are relatively fast. With Ada I was in labor for like 5 hours before pushing as a first time mom. With Eloise, once I got dilated to a 4, I had her within an hour. With Eden, I was dilated to a 3-4 at my last appointment. While it's not a reason to induce, having GBS again did make me uncomfortable because I wanted to ensure I'd get appropriate dosage of the antibiotics before birth.
• My experience with Eloise's essentially induced birth was very positive, so I felt I knew what I was getting myself into. 
• Current research is also trending toward 39 weeks as a more favorable time to induce rather than after 40 weeks.
• Also: I knew my date of conception (due to tracking ovulation several ways, having a confirmation ultrasound for ovulation, and timing of progesterone supplements), so I knew I was truly as far along as I thought.

With all this on my mind, I set October 25th as Eden's birth date. This isn't to say I didn't still have some worry and reservations (until the morning we went in). But after a few days, I felt more at peace with our decision.

PROCESS

The process of my birth with Eden was very similar to what I experienced with Eloise. My water didn't break first, but everything else more or less progressed in the same way.

• I was hooked up to an IV upon admission into the hospital. Fluids, antibiotics, and pitocin were put in right away. 
• We started on 2 units of pitocin, increasing by 2 units every half hour until we reached 16. 
• I was hooked up for continuous monitoring, but I was able to walk around with my medication "tree" and mobile monitor. I'll admit this is the biggest downside in my opinion. It's a lot of stuff to lug around. Getting into the shower, walking around, bouncing on a birth ball -- I had to contend with wires and tubes. This time around I was prepared for it, though.
• The difference is that my doctor broke my water after I'd received enough of the antibiotics. I was afraid that things would immediately get intense, but that wasn't my experience. It still took a couple hours to get really productive contractions.
• Just like with Eloise, I dilated from 4/5 centimeters to 10 within a short timeframe. With Eloise it took about an hour. With Eden it took just 20 minutes.
• The pushing stage with Eloise was like 0 minutes. She basically flew out of me. With Eden, it took 3 minutes with three series of pushes. (Much better than 2 hours with Ada! But I realize that's more of a second, third-time mom thing than an induction thing.)

PAIN, ETC.

Pain is the factor most people ask me about with pitocin. I feel I really lucked out this time around because none of the contractions I had before breaking my water and even in the couple hours following were bad enough to breathe through. By the time they hurt, they were STRONG but  -- in my opinion -- not any worse than I experienced with my unmedicated birth with Ada.

Another thing people ask about is the time between the contractions. I don't know how much pitocin is the ceiling, but on a level 16, my contractions weren't spaced any closer than 2 minutes apart. Most of the time they were between 2-3 minutes. I didn't experience the whole overwhelming, back-to-back contractions that I have read about.

Basically, by the time I was begging for an epidural (something that's happened in all my births, including Ada's), I was at a 9 and nearly ready to push.

What about Eden? The baby is constantly monitored throughout elective induction. And I have been fortunate that both Eloise and Eden tolerated the drugs well. I was constantly reminded that the nurses were watching for baby's health throughout the process.

I suppose I wanted to write this post to share my experience. Again, I never thought I'd elect to induce. I was actually afraid of it and disagreed with choosing when to have a baby. But now I'm more for choice. That's not to say I think everyone should elect to induce. That's not to say I don't still question my own decision at times. But I also don't think it should be regarded poorly. (Trust me. I got a lot of negative feedback.)

In the end, we were fortunate to have a healthy mom and happy baby. If you'd like to read more about my emotions through the process, check out Eden's birth story.

If you have any other questions, I'd be happy to answer them!

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Eden Rhys // Birth Story

Here we are on Eden's due date and she's just a few hours shy of three days old. Where to begin! First, I'll say that what everyone told me about third babies is entirely true. They are certainly wildcards. After having two babies at 38 weeks and 2-3 days, I was absolutely floored when I passed that pregnancy milestone by one, two, three days . . . and then a week, etc. I don't know why I was so much expecting to go around the same time again, but I guess I like trying to control things I can't control.

My pregnancy was great this time around, which is new for me. Eden seemed really happy in there the whole nine months. Until I got to week 37, really. I started getting morning sickness again. I started getting frequent near fainting spells. I got extreme swelling, uh, down below out of the blue that my provider called "significant" and -- yeah -- it was significantly uncomfortable and even worrisome. Basically, as I neared my due date, I was sort of falling apart.

Anyway, at my 38-week appointment, I asked my doctor about elective induction. I truly never considered that I would entertain such an option. But when it WAS an option, it became ever-more appealing due to a number of personal factors. I plan to write more about why I chose this route in my nitty-gritty post about induction soon. What became clear to me when I shared my plans on Instagram is that it's highly personal and controversial. I got many well-meaning messages and comments about letting her cook until she's done, not rushing her, and tons of natural induction suggestions.

But let's skip ahead now to the day Eden was born -- October 25th 2018.

We had scheduled this date mostly because it was the first available. I was 39 weeks and 4 days pregnant. I woke up at 3AM to the sound of Ada rushing into our room and then to the bathroom to throw up. She had the stomach bug. What a wakeup. I didn't fall back to sleep after that (and she continued being sick with Stephen's care -- and we had to leave my in-laws with it, which made me feel terrible) until I called the hospital to see if they had a bed for me at 6AM. They told me to eat a big breakfast and head in around 7. I couldn't eat anything because of my morning sickness but managed to choke down a half cup of Kix cereal.

As we drove to the hospital, I was reminded so much of Eloise's birth day. She was essentially an induction. They called it "augmented" labor because my water "broke" (only a couple tablespoons) and contractions didn't start, so we did the pitocin game. It was calm. I wasn't in pain like I had been with Ada (I had three extremely painful contractions in the five-minute car ride to the hospital with her!). We got a great parking spot, grabbed our hospital bags, and headed to the L+D ward.

When we arrived, we were greeted by our nurse and headed to room 6. In my hospital, the room you labor and deliver in is also your recovery room. Immediately, I started getting some bad vibes because a number of things weren't going smoothly. The computer wouldn't boot up. The medications I needed for GBS weren't getting approved. The labs person was nowhere to be found. The blood pressure cuff kept flying off my arm. All these little glitches kept making me feel like I was tempting fate by scheduling. I said this to Stephen so many times. I quietly wondered if something was just going to go wrong.

After a while, everything started going smoothly. Meds showed up. IV was in. Computer sorted out. Breakfast had arrived as well, and I was told that my doctor didn't restrict food during labor -- SCORE! We started with fluids and a very small dose of pitocin (2) and the plan was to increase by 2 units every half hour until my doctor came to break my water sometime around lunch. I also got the GBS meds shortly after we started and immediately felt some relief knowing I was "covered" fully on those grounds. I had been checked on Tuesday and was 3 cm dilated and somewhat effaced.

So, with everything going, I walked the halls and walked some more.

Contractions had started around every 5 to 7 minutes apart. But they weren't painful at all. In fact, I'd had many more contractions and much more pain the entire day after my cervical check on Tuesday. Hours passed. I kept walking. And nothing was getting much worse. Eden wasn't sitting very low and there wasn't much pressure going on my cervix. We didn't even bother checking for dilation because I was not feeling anything. By around noon, my contractions were around every 3 minutes but completely painless. I was getting anxious for my doctor to arrive to break my water because I'd heard that all hell could break loose.

Aside: On one of our many laps around the unit, we noticed a team arrive to pick up a very sick baby for transport. I obviously couldn't get the details, but I guess the baby was ill enough to need to travel far beyond even our local NICU. I hated being self-centered, but it was another moment where I got afraid something bad was going to happen. 

My doctor showed up at 1PM.

He had a very busy day with a few c-sections and lots of patient hours in the office. I loved my doctor this time around. He is a warm and witty personality. Very calm but sure of his decisions. But not at all arrogant. He greeted me and sensed I was a bit nervous. I remember asking him "is this going to end in a c-section? Nothing is happening!" and he replied that breaking my water would surely get things going. At the same time, he assured me it wouldn't be this out-of-control experience I had heard about. He didn't use a hook as I had heard about either. Instead, he had this little finger glove thing with a pricker on the end of it. I wasn't prepared for that, which is probably a good thing.

I thought he was just checking for dilation (which he was), but then GUSH. Wow. I had actually never experienced my water breaking with my other kids. With Ada, it was intact upon arrival and broke while I was in the shower. With Eloise, it "broke" in a very small amount and then -- again -- broke fully while I was in the shower. Sitting in the bed, the water just flowed and flowed and flowed. It was so warm. And there was so much of it! Every time I moved, it gushed. It was clear, thank goodness, and my doctor informed me that I was at around a 4 cm dilated.

How disappointing!

That was such little progress since Tuesday's exam. At the same time, I had taken a few moments to read Eloise's birth story and realized that I wasn't making tons of progress and was at a 4 . . . and then I dilated REALLY quickly. My doctor said he had more patients to see and -- knowing my previous fast progress -- would ask the nurses to really keep an eye on me so he'd had enough time to get back to deliver me.

I wasn't feeling particularly optimistic because even an hour and then two hours after my water was broken, the contractions just weren't that bad. They did have some pain to them, but not lots of pressure. We kept walking the halls. One of the nurses thought it was kind of funny because there wasn't much hall to walk, so it was constant back and forth! (It was either that or stay in my room and watch news about package bombs to Robert De Niro). But when I walked, my contractions did get a bit closer and stronger.

By 4PM, I was feeling the contractions more. Again, I could talk through them. They were around 2-3 minutes apart. But I didn't have to really stop and breathe. I was getting there, though. Then I remembered that the SHOWER was always the key for me.

I asked to get in the shower with my ridiculous medication tree hooked up (I got another dose of antibiotics for GBS at this time). Pitocin was being held steady at a 16 throughout. My nurse first wanted to check me because I had noticed some blood. I was 4.5 centimeters dilated but "very soft".

Four point FIVE!? Talk about discouraging. I got in the shower. The water wasn't hot enough for me to feel like it was doing much. But then I noticed a difference. Almost right away. I started talking to myself at this point. Saying "down, down, down" and slowly counting to 10 while trying hard to unclench my jaw during contractions (thanks for that tip, Kath!). I even very gently pressed down on my stomach. I could finally feel her starting to descend. I got on my hands and knees and definitely couldn't talk anymore through the contractions.

Stephen called out to me at some point and I had trouble responding. I like to be alone when I'm in pain. I retreat into my own world. It's not that I don't need support, but when I am in labor, I need quiet. I need focus. I get in the zone. But he called my nurse and she immediately sensed that I "sounded very different" and asked if she could check me. She had also noticed some de-cels on my monitor, indicating that the baby had lowered into the birth canal.

I got out of the shower and remember saying that I would like an epidural. ASAP. I had been 4.5 cm dilated just 20 minutes before getting in the shower and seriously doubted that I made much progress. "I'm just not on top of this pain. It's getting bad!" I said, but I was convinced I'd be at a 5 -- maybe a 6. She indicated that she thought otherwise, so she checked me and I was at a 9 -- NINE -- and very stretchy.

"You can start pushing now," she said. "Let me call the doctor."

I was on my hands and knees on the bed now and got my first HOLY HELL contraction where my body felt like it was turning inside out. The mental relief I felt hearing I was near the end pushed me to fully dilated. And -- better yet -- it was 5PM and my doctor had already arrived, as he was already planning to come check on me. I got wind of this news that he was ready and had another powerful contraction. The room started filling with people and machines and I had yet another CRAZY contraction.

I said something about not being able to wait anymore, and my nurse arrived at the bottom of my bed and said we could start. I was scared and said "it's going to hurt!" and, yes, it did. But I was ready somehow. I pushed and my doctor entered the room and slowly got suited up. My first push attempt was poor. I had forgotten exactly how to bear down, so we waited for another contraction . . . and it all made much more sense.

I felt the ring of fire very distinctly. They let me push several times per contraction. Then we waited. I pushed through the next one with all my might and felt her head come out and the extreme fullness of her body . . . but again was told to wait. I think they were trying to control tearing, but I begged to keep going.

I pushed one more time and felt her come out. I looked down and all I saw was a ridiculous amount of dark brown hair. And then I immediately noticed at the nurse to my right was also a nurse we'd had during Eloise's birth. I was shaking out of control at this point because I was in shock.

I went from 4.5 to fully dilated in just 20 minutes.

Pushing had taken three minutes.

At 5:07, I was done.

Eden was here!

And I was also done having babies . . . forever.

It was a lot of feelings all at once. My doctor was cool and calm and collected. He is quiet and I liked that. He assured me everything was great. They placed Eden on my chest immediately, but I will admit I was more retreated into myself. I have trouble focusing on the baby immediately after birth because of the physical stuff my body has just gone through. It's beyond intense.

The placenta was next. And lots of stitching for my second-degree tear (third time I've had the tear). But she was here. She was beautiful. She was safe despite my feeling worried about inducing her too soon.

Most important: She was the final piece to our family. Even though I couldn't stop physically shaking or all those thoughts racing through my brain, I felt the peace almost right away. We had closed a chapter and just opened a new one in that very hospital room. I had a blog back a few years ago about "writing chapter three" -- which in my mind was all about the childbearing years. Starting our family. And I guess now we're in chapter four. The gang's all here and we're making permanent birth control plans.

Cue the tears.

I have so many more things I can share about the actual induction process, why we chose to go that route, and how I've done it twice without pain medication. I would say that this time around my contractions stayed very manageable and spaced no closer than 2-3 minutes, which was incredible. From first "painful" contraction to birth was only like two hours. The rest of the induction was mostly boring and slightly annoying (it's not fun lugging around a tower of medications).

So, if you have questions you want me to cover, let me know. Otherwise, I'm going to go hold Eden if I can pry her from her big sister's arms (Ada is obsessed with her!). More soon, but I wanted to share all these details before they leave my brain.

Eden Rhys

7 pounds, 14 ounces

20.5 inches long

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What's In My Hospital Bag

So,  I'm now 36 weeks -- NINE months. I delivered both Ada and Eloise at 38 weeks, and I figured I'd better pack just to be safe. And this means packing a bag for myself, a few things for baby, and then bags for both girls. Not that they're necessarily going anywhere, but I find it helpful to gather a few things to help whoever ends up caring for them while we're in the hospital.

(14 weeks, 24 weeks, 36 weeks)

I haven't yet had my GBS test (this week!), so I'm not sure of my status. If I'm positive, I know they'll keep me a bit longer in the hospital. Or if I for some reason have a c-section or other complication. Basically, I don't know how many days I'll be at the hospital.

With Ada, it was short and sweet.

With Eloise, we were there three nights.

My bag . . . 

I was surprised when Ada came before my due date and went to the hospital without a hospital bag as a first-time mom. I over-compensated when planning for Eloise and brought a lot of stuff I didn't need. Regardless, each time I've had a baby, I wear the hospital gown during labor and after birth. I use the mesh underwear they provide for me as long as possible. I use the gigantic pads gladly. I don't bring much from home because I don't want it getting bloody and gross.

I may not look cute, but it makes things very simple.

(PS: I am just using an old duffle bag I've had for over 10 years. I resisted buying a cuter one because we're trying to save money. And I have fallen in love with inexpensive packing cubes to keep things separated. They are so worth it.)


Here's what's in my bag:

• Nursing cami
• Nursing bra
• 2 pairs of black underwear
• Black yoga pants
• Loose shirt
• 2 crop tops (for during labor)
• Robe (in case it's cold)
• Muslin blanket (for nursing coverage if/when company is around)
• FitKicks Slippers (I wear the hospital socks during labor, though)
• Travel toiletries (our hospital doesn't provide any)
• Lavender EO mist (because it calms me)
• Wet brush (I forgot any kind of comb/brush last time!)
• Hair ties
• Phone charger
• Sleep eye mask (I have trouble sleeping with lights on)
• VERY basic makeup (mascara, eyebrow pencil, and light foundation)
• DSLR -- maybe
• Snacks (Mama Chia packs, organic Pop-Tarts, sparkling water, maybe a beer!)
• I may also bring my ancient Boppy Pillow

I'll admit it seems like a lot of clothing. I truly don't feel I need this many options unless we end up having to stay for several days. With Eloise, it was nice to have different tops as options. As far as pants go, though, I basically don't wear any until leaving the hospital.

Oh, and WHY CROP TOPS?! I saw them at Target . . . and they seem genius for wearing underneath the hospital gown during delivery. I tend to get totally undressed at some point, but would prefer to have something on top. The crop will allow them to monitor me easily. And I also plan to use the tops as nightshirts and under button-down shirts for nursing. It's a personal choice, but I like feeding below a shirt instead of above it. It's like a mini nursing cover -- LOL!

Things I'm leaving at home that I had brought in the past:

Jewelry, pads (you get plenty in the hospital), nursing pads (milk doesn't usually come in till I'm home), fancy going home outfit, any personal care or makeup more than the basics, any electronics beyond a camera and phone, books, candles, birth soundtrack, etc.

I also have never had a written birth plan. My plan is healthy mom, healthy baby. My two births were so different. So, I am open-minded. That said, I always try to avoid an epidural simply because I'm uncomfortable with needles.

For the baby . . . 

I always see people pack tons of stuff for baby. In our hospital -- for safety reasons -- we're required to dress baby in hospital-marked onesies and blankets at all times. So, the clothing I'm bringing is solely for the last day right before we go home. The hospital also supplies diapers, pacifiers, and pretty much anything else we need.


What's in my bag:

• Two going home outfits (one lighter, one heavier -- no idea on weather)
• Zutano booties (THE BEST!)
• Hat (again, for if it's cold)
• Muslin blanket 
• Wipes (the hospital ones were weird and we had to manually wet them last time)

That's it.

For the girls . . . 

I suppose for the girls it's not as much packing a bag . . . but just making the following things easy to find. I may have a small box in their room with these essentials so my parents or in-laws don't have to hunt around. I will have a bag at the ready if I go into labor early and they need to go with friends for a few hours until the grandparents can get here.

• A pair of pajamas
• Slippers or socks
• Favorite book
• Favorite stuffed animal
• Comfort blanket (both my girls love blankets)
• Easy foods (Mac and cheese, PB&J, grilled cheese, lots of fruit, granola bars)
• A written list of routines for each girl for wakeup, nap, and nighttime

Also:

I got a special present for Ada and Eloise. Ada is getting this gorgeous fairy magnetic dress-up doll set from Melissa and Doug. Eloise is getting this cute Play-Doh Sesame Street set. I kept these gifts inexpensive and activity oriented to help their caregivers occupy them.

I'm probably forgetting something, but this is the main gist.

Now if I could only find our carseat base!

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Pregnancy Update: Halfway There!

I'm nearing week 20 of my pregnancy, and if history repeats itself (which it very well may not), I am more than halfway done! I had both Ada and Eloise at just a couple days past the 38 week point. Last Friday we had our anatomy scan, and everything is looking good with baby girl. The only "issue" is that my placenta is sitting a bit low -- around 2 cm from my cervix. From what my doctor says and what many of you have told me, this should correct itself by birth in most cases. So, I have no restrictions or anything.

I was worried that being almost 35 and being on baby number 3 (pregnancy number 6!) would mean this pregnancy would kick my butt. Not so. I know I should be knocking on lots of wood . . . but this has been my easiest pregnancy by far. I don't have any complaints. I mean, the morning sickness was awful -- but that's been the case each time. I am so thankful that we don't have any weird medical stuff we're watching, like recurrent strep B UTIs or bleeding, etc.

I feel great. I'm still running, and I have no pelvic pain or bladder pressure. I haven't had Braxton Hicks or irritable uterus issues yet, which usually start very early (17 weeks or earlier) for me. I have energy. I can keep up with my crazy toddler during the day. I am sleeping well at night. I have my appetite back and have been eating a mix of foods. I'll admit that I had to feed myself mostly sugar when I was sick because it was the only thing keeping me from vomiting. It's been hard shifting back to healthier foods, but I am doing a good job at balance. At least I think!

While running does still feel great, I can tell that my SI joint is getting a bit finicky. It always does this around now. It's an old running injury from my marathoning days, and I think the hormones make the joint unstable. It doesn't hurt yet . . . but I have moved from tracking mileage to tracking steps each day. I still tend to get four or five 3-milers in each week. But as the weather heats up, etc. -- I am just aiming to get 10,000 steps a day, no matter how they come. I have been averaging around 12,000 -- awesome! (I use this activity tracker by Garmin -- it's great for runners.)

I mentioned on Instagram that I am frustrated because we've had our name picked out for a while . . . and now it's popped up as a character in a really popular television show. Sigh. I mostly don't care, but it's not a great association. I don't see us changing the name, though. And while I did mention a while back that we have the middle name set, I'm now wavering on that choice. We still have plenty of time. We're just the type that's always been pretty set on our decisions with names once we make them. And if you're curious, it starts with the letter E.

Ada is really excited for the baby. She keeps telling me she can feel the kicks, but I know they're still too faint. This first photo is from my pregnancy with Eloise. Ada wanted to recreate the shot last night. She's such a sweetheart.

Eloise still has no idea what's going on. When I say "kiss the baby!" she does bend down and kiss my belly. It's cute. We have been reading this book about breastfeeding for kids, and she gets a kick out of mama milk. So, sometimes when I say "where's the baby?" She points to my boobs. There's part of me that wants to take her to a big sister class, but then I realize that she is really young. It's not going to be the same type of transition that we had with Ada. There will be a day when the baby is still in my belly . . . and then a day when she's out. And Eloise's world will get rocked. Any tips on transitioning to a younger sibling with kids who don't totally get it yet? It's something I haven't dealt with before. And I don't expect it to be perfectly smooth.

(As an aside: We really love the Dr. Sears Baby on the Way and What Baby Needs books to prepare Ada for a new little one. She asks to read these books almost every night. They are written with alternative birthing/doctor/parenting options in mind, too. I highly recommend these books!)

I don't know how much weight I have gained with this pregnancy. My home scale and the doctor scale are totally different, and I didn't catch my initial weight at my doctor. They did say I lost 3 pounds from my 14 to 18 week appointment. I attribute that to eating better and being more active after ditching the morning sickness. I'd say I have gained 5-7 pounds total.

Other stuff: I do still have weird dry heaving and vomiting spells. And I do occasionally had wicked heartburn. The only other unpleasant thing is heart palpitations. They are normal, but I hate when my heart skips a beat and then races to catch up. It happens mostly when I am laying back in a reclined position.

In other news, I am starting to get excited for summer. Stephen will be home for 10 weeks, which is great. It does frustrate me that we cannot time our pregnancies perfectly. I feel like Eloise's birth -- while certainly not in our control -- fell at the perfect time. It was warm and sunny. I had tons of help and support in the summer. When this baby is born, the long cold and dark season will just be beginning. Stephen will be deep in cross country season and away most evenings and Saturdays. I worry I will feel overwhelmed and totally tapped out. I am trying to prepare and get a support system in place.

We'll see what happens, I guess!

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First Trimester + Morning Sickness Survival

I am by no means an expert on all things pregnancy, but I do feel like I have a good handle on the first trimester. And by that, I mean, I've suffered through pretty brutal morning sickness on four separate occasions. Of course I don't know how to CURE it, but I have developed some tactics that make weeks 5 through 13 at least a bit more bearable. I don't think these will work for everyone. But I figure if you haven't tried some of these things, they may be worth trying.

Accept that you may feel really sick. I would say the vast majority of my friends haven't had terrible morning sickness. And this makes vomiting several times a day feel very isolating. You feel like you won some sort of awful lottery. I found when I felt sorry for myself or dwelled on others' good fortune that I would feel much worse. Getting out and about and trying to power through actually helped. Some people get sick. Some people don't. Some people get only mild sickness. There's such a range of normal.

My morning sickness tricks:

• Mix water with lemonade (I got the Newman's Own Organic kind). I couldn't stomach plain water this time around. And the lemonade helped my nausea.
• Take gum everywhere you go. Or hard candy. Find SOMEthing that helps take the edge off when you hit  wave. There's nothing universal that works.
• Consider carrying a plastic grocery bag in your purse or diaper bag for emergencies. Yes. I've puked in my car on several occasions.
• Lay down as often as possible. I realize if you work FT this isn't easy. I used to take short naps in my office at work when I was pregnant with Ada. This time around, I laid on the couch -- puke bucket nearby -- while Eloise roamed around the living room. I gated everything off so it was safe and would rotate toys every few days. I'd play with her from my post and it's surprising how much you can interact this way! 
• Eat what tastes good when you can. I see all these "HOW TO EAT THE BEST FOR PREGNANCY" advertisements on my Facebook lately. Dude, that stuff makes me feel HORRIBLE. I tried so hard to keep eating vegetables and other healthy things in the first trimester and all I ended up doing was throwing up. So, getting some food town trumps throwing up healthy food. Now that I'm in the second trimester, I've replaced all carbs with lots of healthy stuff. But seriously, don't put the pressure on yourself. Your baby is getting a lot from your nutritional stores and your multivitamin.
• Consider skipping your vitamin for a while. Yeah. This sounds counterintuitive, but I did switch to gummy vitamins without iron with Ada and Eloise's pregnancies. This time around since I know have the MTHFR mutation, I skipped vitamins and continued taking only vitamin D and a special methyl-friendly folate supplement. I'd take the full vitamin regimen when I could stomach it. And now I'm fully back on it at 14 weeks.
• Don't spend too much money on gimmicks. There are probiotics that claim to help. Sea Bands, which do NOTHING for me. Special morning sickness candies, teas, etc. None of this stuff has worked for me. I guess it's worth a try, but don't go broke.

Don't ignore symptoms or think everything you feel is pregnancy related. When I was pregnant with Eloise, I was peeing every five seconds in small amounts. I had a lot of pain and pelvic pressure. I figured it was just due to being pregnant. It went on for weeks and I finally decided to speak up. Come to find out, it's not normal to always feel miserable in the first trimester. And I ended up having group B strep UTIs my entire pregnancy. This time around, I have absolutely nothing like that going on. So, if you don't feel well or think something's amiss, chat with your doctor sooner rather than later.

B6 + Unisom under your doctor's guidance. I'll be completely honest that I don't feel this was the miracle cure for me. That said, the Unisom in particular really helped me get to sleep at night and take the edge off my exhaustion during the day. I found when I was less tired, I was also less nauseous. Your doctor can give you guidelines for how many milligrams to take and when. I have seen several approaches. I took a whole tab of Unisom at night with 25 milligrams of B6.

Let your child watch a little a lot of TV. I know there are differing views on this, but to survive, there were weeks when Eloise and Ada watched a lot of TV. If I felt well, I'd try to make the most of it. But in the scheme of life . . . I don't think several weeks of television is going to make or break my kids. Here's a list of Extra Gentle TV Shows for Toddlers/Preschoolers if you need suggestions. We watched Sesame Street on Hulu, and I think it's a great show.

Exercise when you can. I found that continuing with exercise really helped me feel like I was still human. It's been different in every pregnancy, though. With Ada, I had nothing else going on so I could run whenever I wanted and rest whenever I wanted. With Eloise, Ada was in preschool and working out in the mornings often felt the best -- so it was easy. This time around, it was ROUGH. Winter was super long and that meant that stroller running was out of the question. I still was able to keep up with about 12 miles of running each week and some 30 minute sessions of YouTube Barre or yoga sprinkled in. I usually get this hour-long high after working out and my nausea would temporarily subside, so I'd take full advantage and try to eat something good-ish.

Make a count-down calendar. Since this wasn't my first pregnancy, I sort of knew that my nausea tends to subside around 13-14 weeks. I still get bouts of it from time to time, but it's been strangely similar each time. So, I made a paper calendar where I would physically cross off the days as I got closer to the second trimester. It felt overwhelming in the first weeks, but after a while it really helped to see that it would be over soon.

Have your partner cook as much as possible, etc. For me, this wasn't really possible because of track season. Even talking about food for several weeks would get me dry-heaving. So, whenever Stephen was home for dinner -- he knew he was cooking it. Otherwise, I stocked up on lots of healthy heat-up options like organic, low-sodium soups, Mac + cheese (that I'd do with frozen veggies), whole grain toaster waffles, and other really quick meals that required like no prep and no interaction with the food. It sounds awful saying I didn't cook for my kids for that long, but I seriously just couldn't. We got into a good groove, though. Whole fruit does wonders in a pinch.

Ask for help. I flat out begged my parents to come hang out with me on long days when it was really bad. I mean, they wanted to visit anyway, so it was a win-win. But if you face really long days alone with kids when you have bad morning sickness, take offers from friends or family to watch your kids or just help out. It feels weird at first, but it can do wonders just having a little support.

Remember: You're doing the best you can. It's easy to go hard on yourself for not doing lots of Pinterest art projects, cooking expert meals, or being like an A+ mom in all regards. But you're pregnant and likely feeling quite awful. It will end -- hopefully soon. Again, this is a blip on the radar of your entire life. Most likely, your kids won't remember you having to check out temporarily. Do what you need to do to survive.

Also: Revel in the times when you thrive -- and try not to worry that means something is wrong with the baby. If you feel well, try to eat something or get some exercise. Enjoy those moments of relief. Take it from me, I was wickedly ill and still miscarried . . . so I do not believe that morning sickness strength is always the indicator of a healthy pregnancy. And the reverse, then, would also not mean that having no morning sickness means something is wrong.

Do you have any tips to share? 

* Image source

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My Major Parenting Decisions, Explained

People are nosey by nature. And I'm an open book. I get so many DMs about different lifestyle and parenting choices we've made with people asking why we do it that way, how it works for us, etc. Usually it's people who are mulling over their own decisions and looking to gather info. So, I figured I'd post some thoughts on the questions I get the most frequently. This is just what works for us as a family. It's not what I think everyone should do by any means.

Our kids are vegetarian and always have been.

So many of you asked me yesterday about why our family is vegetarian and if our kids still are or if they're ever eaten meat, etc. Lots of variations on the general theme. I've written about it in the past, but -- in short -- I decided to stop eating meat when I was 13. I never liked meat, so it was purely a dietary preference thing. I haven't eaten meat since and I was vegan for several years in college and different spurts in my twenties. For me, being a lacto-ovo vegetarian works best, which means I eat milk and cheese and eggs, etc. Stephen has been a vegetarian since college, when he actually started as a vegan. He has been vegetarian ever since, but has dabbled in eating fish on occasion. Usually when we're on vacation at the ocean and it is freshly caught that day locally.

We didn't sit down and have a big talk about whether or not our kids would eat meat. It was just this understanding that we have lived a vegetarian lifestyle and eaten primarily vegan and vegetarian foods for a big chunk of our lives. Our kids would follow suit. Ada has had fish but doesn't like it. We feed both girls a lacto-ovo diet because it's what we eat as a family. Neither kid has ever eaten meat. Ada is actually quite opposed. She's getting to the age where she's asking a lot of questions and feels a lot of pride in being a vegetarian.

Now our decision to live this way spans beyond dietary preference. We do appreciate the animal rights, environmental impact, and health benefits of eating this way. It's also cheaper, which is a bonus. This isn't to say I'm forbidding our kids from eating meat, but I do not think I would ever prepare it in the home. But we'll cross that bridge as we come to it. So far, most people in our lives just know we are vegetarian, and it hasn't been an issue. We write it on forms for school and summer camps, and -- just like allergies, etc. -- it's been catered to without any issues.

I have never planned to homeschool.

Don't get me wrong, the idea of homeschooling is very intriguing to me. I love the idea of guiding my kids along their path of learning and allowing a more flexible and, at times, more enriching environment for them to grow their brains and learn about the world. I just think I can do this in addition to a quality public school education.

There is this inherent privilege, though, that comes with being able to homeschool. I feel like it isn't brought up too much. Like, I just know I cannot fully commit to a full course of homeschooling grades K through 12 for my children because -- while I'm not working tons of hours right now -- I know I will want to return to more full-time work in the future. This isn't just for me . . . it's practical for our family that I not leave the workforce for that long. I do work from home now, but I'm hoping to expand on those hours after all my kids are school age.

I can totally geek out when I look at different homeschool curriculums. I love the creativity and space that it allows. The flexibility with scheduling, etc. But honestly, my husband is a public school teacher. For this reason, I do support public education. We moved specifically to a school district that is consistently ranked in the top two in the area (Stephen's school is the other top). Plus, the flexibility is nice . . . but we wouldn't be traveling throughout the year since Stephen's job doesn't allow for time off.

Instead, we try to use our summers to get those less-traditional opportunities. I am hoping whatever job I choose in the future will allow for flexibility in the summers so we can enjoy this time as a family.

I will continue to stay at home/work from home.

Yes. Money. It's not the smartest financial thing, perhaps, for me to be at home with part-time hours. Stephen and I both feel strongly that me being home is important. I see working moms totally rocking their situations, and there are times when I look longingly at the structure their days permit. When my kid is screaming and skipping naps, I wonder what it might be like to be at lunch in my old office in peace and quiet. But I know that working moms deal with so much too, like astronomical daycare costs and feelings of guilt, etc.

It's like a no-win situation. Stephen coaches two sports, which I complain about, but it gives our yearly income a nice boost. Now that we're getting close to paying off student loans and other debts . . . we have more wiggle room. This isn't to say I'm comfortably living large over here. I'll do an updated budget post soon. I cherish this time I get to spend with my kids. I surely complain at times, but I think we all do from time to time.

I do plan to either expand freelancing hours to more full-time or to go back to a FT or PT real-life job when my kids are all in school. But, as I mentioned earlier, I'd like to have a schedule that allows me to enjoy lots of time in the summer with my family.

I cloth diapered, then didn't, but might again.

Several of you have asked if I plan to cloth diaper baby number three. I had plans to do it with Eloise. I did it for nearly a year and a half with Ada. But I got sucked in by the convenience of Aldi diapers. They have worked wonderfully for us, and they don't cost terribly too much. But along the way I have felt guilty tossing out so much trash. Like, really guilty at times. And I look at our budget and how I may need to step back on my freelancing hours . . . cloth may be in our future.

I do have an impressive stash that would work well for the new baby. I think I'll write more about this in a baby-related post. To summarize, I support cloth diapering. But I don't understand people who rave about it. It's poop and pee that you have to get up close and personal with. As much as supporters say it's awesome . . . it isn't, like, FUN. So for me, it would be more out of my feelings of environmental responsibility and money. I wouldn't be giddy about it.

I breastfeed. But it's complicated.

I do also plan to breastfeeding this next baby if I'm lucky. I breastfed Ada for nearly 18 months and I breastfed Eloise to age one. With Eloise, I had lot of difficulty because I felt over-touched a lot. Getting used to the demands after years of independence was hard for me. I have no romantic notions that it will be different this time. But, as mentioned above, to save money I know I will need to fully commit.

That said, I feel better prepared this time around for the challenges I may face. I will try to have a plan in place to make sure I don't get too overwhelmed. This may mean pumping more bottles and trying bottles sooner. This may mean occasional supplementation with formula, which did NOT impact our relationship or my supply whatsoever.

In the end, breastfeeding is a very personal choice. And I feel fed is best. I have absolutely no judgement for women who do purely formula, as I was brought up that way. And I have no judgement for women who allow their kids full access to their boobs at all times. I am a more baby-led, but also mom-allowed breastfeeding. I know that doesn't make sense. But scheduling feeds as soon as we're able helps me with my sanity.

I guess more on this will come in another post as well.

We don't bed-share.

While I love the idea and understand the practicality of bed-sharing, it's not for me. I explained this a bit on Instastories a couple weeks ago. While I do room-in with my babies for up to six months (yay reflux scares!) . . . putting my babies in my bed scares the crap out of me, especially in the beginning. I've experienced sleep paralysis and other weird issues that make me truly feel it isn't safe . . . FOR ME. I don't judge, though, because there were a couple times when Ada was small when it worked out very well to get through a tough night.

But I don't plan to bed-share with our new baby. She will sleep next to the bed in a Pack 'n Play (my neighbor was so kind to give me hers with a bassinet attachment!).

We're having three kids. A "larger" family.

I talk a lot about saving money. So some people -- family included -- have asked why we would add another child to our family is money is a concern. That's complicated. And it's hard to fully explain. First of all, family size is another highly personal issue, despite how visible it is to society. People are always going to comment. But when thought long and hard over whether or not adding a third would be good in our case.

When we were going through infertility and recurrent pregnancy loss, our ideas of being a family of five really solidified. We realized that we value the people in our lives more than the things. We may not be jetting off to Disney world. We may not have a fancy van with heated seats, automatic doors, etc. (I've been lusting over these lately!). We may just be camping and living on the simple things in life. But we felt strongly that if we didn't go for number three, we'd regret it.

And that's OK. College is a question some have specifically asked about. This is a HUGE topic, so I'm going to gloss over our thoughts. I do not feel that it is my responsibility as a parent to pay for full college for all my children. I feel it is my responsibility to help my children find their path in life. I'd like them to at least go to community college . . . but I am not going to teach them that a four-year school is THE PATH, as we were taught. My parents generously paid for half my education. I worked and got loans for the rest. And I shouldn't have gone to a private, out-of-state school. It's my responsibility to help guide my kids to better choices that will be good for their education and financial futures.

That said, we truly value education, so we will help our kids with whatever they choose to do.

We let our kids watch television. Sometimes lots of it.

Eloise is watching Sesame Street as I type this blog post. As a work-from-home mom, I have utilized television with both my girls to get things done. I am also very present with them and play with them many hours each day. We spend lots of time outdoors. We go to museums and play centers. But television -- in my humble opinion -- is totally fine.

I don't coach learning at home.

This is getting rather long.  So I'll go over one last topic. Many have asked what I'm doing to teach Eloise things at home. And the answer to this is "nothing specific". With Ada, I definitely went out of my way to be like: "Look at the blue ball. Blue. Can you say blue? Where's the blue ball?" You get the point. Anyway, some of this is OK. And when it arises naturally, sure -- I do it. But I don't work in coaching the alphabet, shapes, etc. throughout the day. Granted Eloise is still young. But I'm in the camp that play gets a lot of this stuff into the mix naturally (we also read lots of books).

So, with Eloise and this future baby girl, I am taking a more relaxed approach. A more learn-by-doing, don't fret the rest approach. I will be sending Eloise to preschool at age three. I may even enroll her in a short program next year for socialization, etc. But I truly feel like young children just need to be young children. We'll sing songs, we'll go out and explore the world, we'll do art projects . . . but we won't sit and do flash cards.

Phew. I feel very much open to judgement now, but I'm OK with that. We all do things the way we do them for a reason. So, it's all good.

* Image source is from Etsy. How cute is that? It's customizable. I may need to get one!

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It's a Girl!

We're so happy to share that we'll be adding another sister to the family. The way I chose to find out was pretty anticlimactic. We had the genetic testing done and -- as part of it -- you find out the sex if you choose. So, the nurse asked me on the phone if I wanted to know. And I eagerly replied: "YES!" And then she said "would you like it in an envelope to pick up" -- and before she could finish her question, I was like "TELL ME, TELL ME!"

Because I'm horrible with surprises.

When she said IT'S A GIRL . . . it was such an unexpected experience. Hearing we were having another girl brought this wave of calm over my body. I immediately felt in my heart that our family is complete. It feels like this is what is meant to be. And I think raising a boy would have been interesting, but not terribly much different.

We went into this pregnancy with absolutely no preference. We never have had a sex preference -- children are all such gifts and PEOPLE are complex, so boy/girl really doesn't say too much in terms of how life will be. She'll have a vagina. Otherwise, we'll treat her like a human. Heck, I took wood shop and metal working instead of cooking and sewing in school. Being a girl or boy doesn't necessarily dictate interests.

Eloise still doesn't understand what's going on, but Ada is thrilled to hear there's another sister coming. We immediately went out and bought her a coming home outfit. I mean, this kid is destined to a life of hand-me-downs, she deserves SOMEthing special, right?

We've received such warm responses to our news, too. So many of you have shared that you come from all-girl families and that the bonds you have with your sisters is amazing. I have a younger brother and I had all male cousins until I was an adult. Being surrounded by boys my whole life felt like my destiny. So, raising girls is special to me. I do feel a special bond with them that I would describe as being different. Again, it's not really that they're GIRLS. But I suppose that must play in at some point. We'll share trials and other things that only girls/women can understand on some level.

I have also been told that we're in for an eternity of hearing comments like "Oh, your poor, poor husband" or "Are you going to keep trying for a boy?" or "You'll have to beat away the boys when they're teenagers" (Uh, what if one or more turns out to be gay? So many stereotypes and such!). As if somehow that matters. It's already become a reality even just one day after sharing the news. But we'll shake it off. Honestly, we're all incredibly stoked and genuinely feel like our family is complete with another girl.

And we think we have a first name! It just came to me the other day. It's a name we've considered in the past, but it somehow feels right this time around. That said, I may get hormonal and decide against it. Still very much lost on middle names as well. But knowing we're having a girl and knowing that we may have her name is making this feel all the much more real.

I'm almost 12 weeks. Everything is looking good. Aside from morning sickness, I don't have any pregnancy complaints. This is very different from my last pregnancy, and I hope to write more about it soon. Oh, and our genetic screen came back with low risk of chromosome issues -- and that's really what I was most excited of all to hear. Obviously there are other serious health issues that a screen would not pick up. But we've been there and done that, so we'll take each day as it comes.

Hope you have a great Friday!

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Advanced Maternal Age, etc.

Thank you so much for your congratulations on our big news. I had another ultrasound last week and was so excited to see that baby was measuring 11 weeks with a strong heartbeat -- 168 bpm. The scan has definitely helped me relax a bit as I get closer to the second trimester. Some of you who follow me on Instagram know that I am anxiously awaiting results from free cell DNA blood work that I had done last Thursday. I should know by the end of the week if our baby has a risk of certain chromosomal disorders. And, yes, we're also finding out the sex this way. My guess is girl, so we'll see if I'm correct!

This week, I'm going to do all things pregnancy. So, if you'd rather skip -- I'm just letting you know. What I wanted to write about today is how I'm feeling. Not necessarily physically, though there is some of that I'll cover. But more what it's like to have my first pregnancy where I'm classed as advanced maternal age. I didn't care much at first, but seeing it checked off on my paperwork a few times now . . . it's had a surprising effect on me.

I mean, at 34, I realize I'm only on the cusp (I'll deliver when I'm 35) . . . but now I'm officially an older mom. (Image source)

For a silly example, in previous pregnancies, I've wavered on whether or not I should color my hair. My roots would bug me. This time around, I have quite a crop of grey hairs that are sprouting. I always thought I'd transition gracefully, but they're making me so darned self conscious! It's yet another reminder that I'm getting older. That doesn't have to be a bad thing, but somehow it just feels so different.

(As an aside, I ordered a new Overtone hair conditioning color. I'll write about it soon!)

I also started this pregnancy at the highest weight and lowest fitness level of any of my pregnancies. And that's not helping with self esteem. I feel a bit sluggish and chubbier that I'd like before I really start packing on the pounds. I am trying to jog 3 miles, 3 to 4 times a week, but it's been tough. I mostly have the evenings to fit in workouts and that's when I've been the sickest and most tired throughout the day. I've skipped a lot of workouts as a result.

I have tried not reading too much into AMA being a risk factor for certain complications throughout pregnancy and delivery. But I know as we age, there can be more risks of certain things. For example, I have had high blood pressure at a lot of my appointments so far. After taking it at the end of the appointment, we're all pretty sure it's white coat syndrome. But there's this nagging part of me that worries about preeclampsia developing later on.

One thing I like about being an older mom is that I am not really worrying much about after delivery. You know, when the baby is actually here. I've been there and done that. I know that I don't need to spend hours toiling over a registry or worrying about what gadgets I might need. The answer to most things is that I don't need them. We are trying to figure out sleeping arrangements. I think we'll be moving Eloise's room to the spare behind Ada's. It's small, but it'll provide some noise insulation from the baby being in our room. I'll get into this more another time.

I did have to go out and buy some maternity clothing. Like I said, I started out heavier than normal (months on progesterone will do that to you). All of the clothing I wore during Ada's pregnancy -- same seasons -- way too small. (And honestly, I'm sick of it. Like first-generation Liz Lange from Target.) Maybe I'll do a small maternity clothing capsule for you guys!

OK. What else? Well, I do enjoy the added monitoring throughout my pregnancy. As I've written before, my pregnancy with Eloise was rife with anxiety. And for good reason. But I felt my midwife didn't take my concerns seriously and didn't really offer much peace of mind. This time around, I am seeing an OB who is extremely understanding of that piece. He gave me additional ultrasounds in the first trimester, for example. And I know that as an AMA mom, there are more tests that go along with the process (like the free cell DNA). Some people don't like added stuff, but I am happy to get any and all information that's available.

Other topics I plan to cover this week include how I'm managing morning sickness, thoughts on being a family of five, and perhaps I'll know if baby is a girl/boy in time to share! If you guys would like me to write about anything specifically, let me know.

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And Baby Makes 5

If you don't follow me on Instagram, you may have missed our announcement last week:

I am nearing week 10 of my pregnancy with our third child, and we're all incredibly excited. It still feels like early days, so I do share this news with some cautious optimism. But since I've been so open with our TTC journey, I felt disingenuous not telling you all something that's been such a big part of life lately.

Our due date is November 1st officially, but I'm measuring according to when I know I ovulated (super early for me), so more like October 28th. This is a special date because it's the same due date I have with my longest-lasting miscarriage two years ago. I'm actually coming up on my D&C anniversary this week, which is all sorts of crazy to think about.

I found out I am pregnant a couple weeks after my fertility testing. My midwife had recommended I get checked out after four months of TTC with ovulation timing using OPKs and using progesterone support. I ended up waiting 6 months, so I got pregnant on what was cycle 7 of trying to conceive. I ovulated on day 10 of this cycle, which is very (very!) early for me. And something new is that I also experienced ovulation bleeding for the first time in my life. I hadn't had a pelvic exam as part of my fertility testing since my pap was recent (so, the bleeding wasn't from that) . . . so when I had the bleeding, the doctor suggested I get an ultrasound, which confirmed ovulation on my right side

This is a bit kooky, but stay with me. I rarely ovulate on my right side. I am very in tune with my body and feel all the feels leading up to ovulation. I'm almost certain that every time I have been pregnant, it's been from ovulation on the right. I have a lot of pain when I ovulate on the left, and I just have a theory that I have a bum ovary. Who knows -- but I do find it interesting.

Anyway, I was convinced I wasn't pregnant because I hadn't been despite perfect timing for the previous six months. Silly, but why would it change? I took a pregnancy test (a cheap Wondofo) more to rule it out one morning right after Ada got on the bus for school. I didn't even look at the test for a few hours because I knew it would be stark white. So, imagine my surprise when I went to toss it out before lunch and saw a very faint pink line. I immediately called Stephen to tell him because I'm suave like that. But I didn't call the doctor for several days. Part of me was convinced it would be a chemical or that it just wasn't really happening.

When I ended up calling the doctor, they told me CONGRATS! And immediately said "Well, you'll be coming in for your tutorial on how to use Lovenox injections then, when can we make your appointment?" And I was like "WHAT?!" Panic mode.

I hadn't received my formal results in the mail yet . . . I got them the next day, and that's when I discovered that I have a MTHFR mutation. I wrote about that more in this post. Long story short (because it's a long story -- and many of you guys really helped me out) . . . I met with my doctor and opted not to do the injectable blood thinners. Since I have just one mutation, baby aspirin may be enough (it was for Eloise) . . . and my doctor had simply offered Lovenox as a precaution based on my miscarriage history. If any of you are interested, I can share more about this. I just don't want to bore you with details.

My first appointment was at 6 weeks and 4/5 days. My mom went with me because she and my dad were up visiting that day. I was so nervous for my ultrasound, but the probe immediately found the baby . . . and the little flickering heartbeat. Measuring exactly how far I thought I would be. After the ultrasound, I met with my doctor again. He's incredible. I can't say enough great things about this new practice and its staff. My pregnancy with Eloise was full of anxiety. And the staff didn't help matters. My fertility doctor there was great, but after I graduated from his care, I was unhappy.

I wasn't a pushy or annoying patient either. But, like, I had to BEG for ultrasounds even if I had a legitimate worry (like frequent contractions or bleeding). My midwife often just flat out denied giving me them and I'd go long stretches with so much worry. It snowballed and made me a wreck at times. I explained this to my new doctor and he said "why wouldn't I want to put your mind at ease? We'll set you up for frequent monitoring in the first trimester -- no problem." So I have been having ultrasounds every two weeks until I hit 12 weeks. For me, it's just helpful in the early stage to see that development is going steady.

I am going to be advanced maternal age when I deliver, so I was offered a free cell DNA genetic screen to check for any abnormalities in the fetus. I will be getting that blood work done next week and should have the results shortly after. I will also learn the sex from this screening (we have ZERO preference), but that wasn't my primary reason for doing it. I am genuinely interested in this type of testing, so I think it will be educational . . . and I would want to be prepared for what we discover if anything.

I am sure I'm glossing over a lot of stuff. Something I have found interesting is that in the four pregnancies I have had that have lasted long enough -- my morning sickness has been almost identical. I have good notes, and it seems to start at 5 weeks and 4 days each time. I throw up a few times a day (yum) and generally cannot tolerate eggs, bananas, dirty dishes, toilets, etc. I may have a special post dedicated to morning sickness. I feel like an expert.

Oh, I suppose something that is interesting about this being the third baby is that I am definitely showing. I can't break out maternity jeans or cradle a bump just yet . . . but my lower abdomen is firm and rounded. I have always had a retroverted uterus -- but not this time. It may have flipped after Eloise's birth. I wonder if that has something to do with it. I will share more about how I'm feeling and what's going on in the moment after my next ultrasound. Again, it's still early and anything can happen. But we're happy to share our news.

Thank you for reading!

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10th anniversary, baby-making, and more

So much updating to do. So many things left on our to-do list before summer vacation ends. Figured I’d write up a quick what’s-going-on-over-here type post today before I dig into other good stuff later this week and beyond.

Like, literally dig in . . .

// 1: Upcoming posts

Here’s what on tap for soon. Hold me to them! I should be better scheduling my time now that school is back in session. I have gotten rather lax with my wake-ups since I don’t HAVE to finish my freelance stuff in the early AM hours. But come next Tuesday, I’ll be up at 5:30 AM each morning. I’m even considering getting up earlier to shift my workouts.

We’ll see. Regardless:

• 5 frugal accomplishments as of late
• Suburban homesteading projects for fall
• Budget update and whether or not we’re paying down our debt
• Super easy yeasted naan recipe perfect for freezing + making individual pizzas
• Our family command center that’s both fabulous and functional
• Day in the life of a coach’s wife
• More second-hand shopping ninja tips, including thoughts on resale
• Less waste missteps I’ve made and how I’ve corrected them
• Inexpensive toddler + big kid activities we’re enjoying
• Our favorite vegetarian school lunches

// 2: Back-to-school stuff

So many of you guys are already in back-to-school mode. We’re still off for a little over a week, so it hasn’t been too much of a thing in our house. Still, we’ve purchased our school supplies, browsed good lunch recipes on Pinterest, and done the necessary school clothes shopping. Thing is, now we’ve got TOO many clothes between those that kinda-sorta fit and those that are brand-spanking new. I’m going to go through and try my best to make a more minimal wardrobe for Ada (and Eloise), and I hope to share that soon.

I definitely want to keep the nicer, newer things for school but also have a good stock of play clothing, as Ada plays HARD. She’s always getting grass stains and holes. I need to find better ways to launder out the stains and maybe even learn some mending. It’s always a shame when a pair of pants is good except a pesky hole at the knee.

Any suggestions?

// 3: 1997 style

Anyone else a fan of Safiya Nygaard? Yeah, she may be more than a decade my junior -- but her videos are well-researched and often hilarious. I especially enjoyed the latest exploration of style in the late 1990s -- 1997, specifically.

Some of you guys may recognize those magazines, advertisements, and Delia’s catalogs. I am definitely guilty at age 13 of taking a photo of Rachel from Friends into my hairdresser. Heck, in 1997, I was in my most prime teenage year because it was all so new to me. I tried all these trends, including the chopsticks in my hair.

// 4: Uterine happenings

I had my midwife appointment last Wednesday. I was particularly anxious about this appointment because my midwife is leaving the area. There also aren’t any midwives currently working in my area aside from another one who is leaving in November. So, I need to find another doctor, which is kind of weird for me. I’ve been at the same practice for a decade. But the doctor I may go with is at another practice and another hospital.

Though we aren’t 100 percent ready to (or sure we will) try for a third, I had a lot of questions for my midwife because she was most familiar with my issues from before Eloise’s pregnancy. In the end, we decided that if we do go that route, I will immediately using baby aspirin and progesterone. Research is mixed on whether or not this combination truly works. It did for me -- but it could have been coincidental (I think not -- but I don’t hold a medical degree). Anyway, I now have a standing prescription at the pharmacy that’s good for a year. We’ll see if we end up using it or what happens there.

Obviously it may seem strange to some of you for sharing this type of information. I only do it because I think trying after having losses is hard. I know some of you have found my blog through dealing with infertility or miscarriage. Even if you’ve had another successful pregnancy, the doubt and fear is very real. I don’t take any of it for granted. In the end, if we do try for another child I’m not thinking I could emotionally deal with going through what happened the last time. So, if it came to that, we’d likely (happily) move onto life as a family of four.

// 5: The big 1-0

Stephen and I will be celebrating out 10th wedding anniversary on Friday. I mean, that’s pretty insane to me. We started dating in college in 2005, so we’ve been together a little over 12 years. In the last 10, we’ve moved cities, bought two houses, had two kids, and shared a bunch of other milestones.

10 years of marriage looks pretty great, eh?


Here’s more photos from our wedding day. I scanned them in because this was before it was necessarily normal to get big digital drop boxes of your photos. This was also before the times of Pinterest and crazy photo-shoots. I sort of love that we got married before it became all rustic barns, Mason jars, and food trucks.

Some of my friends have jetted off to Europe or done other grand things to celebrate their milestone anniversaries. Sure, that’s would be fun. Maybe I’m a little jealous. But money/time doesn’t allow for those things over here. Instead, we bought a luxury edition of Scrabble (ours is white) that I found for less than half price at Home Goods, went out to our favorite Indian restaurant when we had babysitting a few weeks back, and will probably spend the evening on Friday crafting a homemade meal. And that’s truly enough. We’re both easy to please.

That’s all for today. More soon! 

Any requests for which posts to do sooner rather than later?

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Pregnancy: Week 25

Not a whole lot has been changing from week to week with my pregnancy, so for now I plan to group and do updates every other week (or so -- who knows, I change my mind constantly). I'm 25 weeks and 3 days today. Just 102 days to go according to my Sprout app. That sounds so far along and so far away all at the same time.

Here's the bump (it's so dark outside today!):

Though I get lots of Braxton Hicks, so far I seem to have avoided irritable uterus. At least how it was with Ada. I credit being able to vary my days between sitting/standing more. And I make a point to lay down whenever I first notice them. This is a true luxury, I know, with working from home. But not having the completely anxiety of contracting all the time has been really nice. I hope it keeps up this way. I probably get 1-2 an hour, max in the afternoon + evenings. They do start to get bad if I sit at my desk or ride in a car for longer than 30 minutes.

After yet another mini-freakout about GBS UTI #2, I decided I'm just going to trust my midwife. I have read a ton of research and info, and because I've had GBS persistently in my urine, I'm highly colonized and have a much greater chance of passing it on during labor. (Ugh. Terrifying.) I'll write more about my thoughts re: labor soon, but with Ada -- I was only laboring for around 5 hours (!!!) before I started pushing. I'm hoping to get those antibiotics in time, but I guess we'll likely be in the hospital for 48 hours after Baby E's birth if I don't get them.

We are trying to make plans for what to do with Ada during labor. Our nearest family is around 2 hours away. And with how fast Ada's labor was + needing the meds immediately, we won't have time to wait at home. So, that's foremost on my mind these days. I'd love your thoughts and experiences if you had a similar situation! Especially if something happens in the middle of the night. Did you ever have to take your child to the hospital with you?

I had officially stopped running at 23 weeks, but I actually did end up keeping with it 3-4 times a week since then. However, I definitely had my last run this pregnancy on Sunday at 25 weeks. It feels OK to continue (especially with my Blanqi tank), but I would rather walk and do other activities. After my runs, I have been particularly tired and achy, and I'd rather not feel that way. I am psyched to start running again in the summer.

We're planning to have Baby E sleep in our room for several months, just like we did with Ada. We have a Pack 'n Play, but I have started looking into Arms Reach Cosleepers. Do you guys think it's worth the extra if I have something similar? I put a call out on a local yard sale group to see if I can find a gently used one. I think nursing in the middle of the night would be much easier with the cosleeper versus the Pack 'n Play.

I'm having some body image issues. I hate that I'm even going there because I am so thankful just to be pregnant, but in my first pregnancy -- I felt pretty amazing. This time around, I started at a higher weight and lower fitness level. But now that the pounds have started to pack on and my fitness has waned, I feel self conscious. Obviously I'm not fretting over the weight or actually getting upset. I'm thrilled to be pregnant and think about this blessing all the time. It's just . . . different. I don't like dressing myself. Everything feels so small. I have around 15 weeks to go. Meh.

I had some name doubt last week and almost changed Baby E's name. But after chatting with Stephen, we're still set on our original plan. Even today when I said it out loud, it just felt right. I think I'm finally starting to envision life with a baby again, which is a big step for me mentally. Yeah. that's my biggest report for this week. I have a sense of excitement rising from within my core that I haven't felt until recently.

Other stuff:

• Kicks have turned into rolls and those funky long movements. Like when you can feel a hand go from way up here to way down there. There's always a dance party going on in there.
• Latest cravings revolve around cheese and pretzels, cranberry juice mixed with seltzer water, and avocados.
• I really, really, really missed a good poached egg atop toast.
• My glucose test is next week. I failed by a point with Ada and had to take the 3-hour. Let's hope that doesn't happen this time.
• I get up no fewer than 5 times to pee each night. Have mercy!
• I've started really thinking about what the baby will look like. We didn't get a good photo from our 18 week scan, but I can tell that her scull is shaped differently from Ada's. It's less round and her forehead seems bigger (maybe more like mine?). Ada thinks the baby will have red hair, but I don't think that's possible with our genetic makeup.
• We're trying to find a few things for Ada to do that are special this summer. We're thinking swimming lessons, daddy + daughter library dates, and maybe a short summer morning day-camp.
• There are times when I get quite emotional thinking about those final days when Ada will be my only child. I have a lot to write about it for another day.

Other updates:

• 23 weeks
• 21 weeks
• 20 weeks
• 19 weeks
• 18 weeks
• 17 weeks
• 16 weeks
• 15 weeks

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