The Season

My friend Lindsey and I were recently chatting through our masks at a local ice cream shop. She said that her younger son refers to what we're all going through right now with COVID as "the season". I like looking at it that way because it means that it will pass. In this moment, it feels like this big question mark with no end date and with endless battles still left to be waged.

I started to write myself a note on my phone. I haven't felt inspired to write or journal for, well, years (I mean, look at the last time I updated this blog!).

I wrote:

Weekends aren't weekends.

Nothing feels like a break.

Life is beyond hard.

And it gets harder when you realize you aren't appreciating any of it anymore.

I dreamed for years of being a mom.

And I'm not appreciating my children.

This time is fleeting.

Now it all feels like work.

Work that I resent.

I want my life back.

I want their lives back.

I'm sick with indecision and uncertainty.

I can't do this anymore.

I want this to end.

When will this end?

It sounds like a dramatic cry for help. It's really not. I'm mentally fine -- chugging along -- but I'll get these moments where it feels like . . . A LOT. Because LIFE IS HARD normally. Right now? It's just not something I ever imagined.

I was hit by a car while walking in November. that was very difficult both physically and emotionally for me. I'm still dealing with issues on both sides. Beyond that (and like many of you), we have had basically no breaks from our kids since COVID started. We love them, but it's too much togetherness for all of us. On top of it, we canceled summer vacations. We now agonize over trips to the store. We have worn deep paths at local parks and trails. We are running out of steam. We're . . . over it.

Yet we're not anxious to return to normal life. We dutifully wear our masks everywhere we go, and we believe it's a small thing we can do to help. Still, we have trouble with the idea of going to in-person dining at restaurants. We have sheepishly ducked out of playdates and social invites.

Maybe we're too strict? I don't know. If you aren't, don't feel too judged. While I don't agree, I understand the desire to just get back what we have lost on some level. And I fully acknowledge and appreciate our privilege to lay so very low. What we're up against is invisible. What we know about the disease and how to deal with it seems to change on the daily. Our numbers here in NY state are low. It's easy to think we crossed some hurdle or milestone. In reality, it's just not so.

If you follow me on Instagram, you know I am considering homeschooling. I wish I could tell you I'm a homeschool mom who is LIVING for the idea of teaching my children from home. In the past, it was a fantasy of mine. I've written posts about it or shared some things I was doing with my kids to teach them. Like many bloggers, I was trying on a persona. One that just doesn't fit who I really am. I can admit that now that I'm weeks away from turning 37 and have given up trying to be someone I'm not.

So, while I wish I could tell you I have confidence in my ability to be that kind of mom -- I'm not. But my desire to homeschool now more out of necessity. I also feel like taking more kids out of the schools might help those people who don't have it as an option. Fewer kids will lower risks. At least that's my hope.

My own mom knows me quite well, and she has asked me: "What would it take for you NOT to homeschool (because she knows it would drive me bonkers)?"

And, honestly, I couldn't think of a scenario.

That said, we value public education. It's our livelihood. I was planning to start freelance work at a higher level this year with two kids in school. (Eloise is slated to start pre-kindergarten!) We wonder if Stephen will be forced to teach in-person classes and to coach. Or will he be forced to gather together an online curriculum at the very last minute? And will we lose coaching income we depend on -- especially now that our grocery bills are out of control with being home 100% of the time?

I wonder if homeschooling will redirect funds from our school district. Funds they desperately need to operate, especially in these times. We have every intention of returning to public school . . . and there's also this feeling of sadness for leaving a community. We just moved in March to a new district and Ada never had the opportunity to start at her new school. It has felt odd to be in a new neighborhood with people we don't know. We've had some waves here and some short conversations there. I can't tell if I am mourning leaving our old community or mourning the life we used to have before this all began.

In the end, I don't know what we'll end up doing. In the immediate future, we're just anxiously awaiting the state guidelines. From there, we wait for Cuomo's decision in early August as to whether or not the physical buildings will open.

If you made it this far. Hi! It's been a long while. I felt compelled to come on here and just say hello. I hope you are faring well in the season. If you aren't, I assure you that you're not alone. This morning, in fact, I chatted online with three different real life friends of mine who cried (me too!) mulling over all the possibilities in the coming year. I'm sure those won't be the last tears we'll all have over these matters.

BTW: This photo was taken of us in the first days of the shutdown for the Front Porch Project. It feels like an eternity ago. But, hello!

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Our Play Spaces

As I mentioned in the last bit on toys (why we sold most of our toys), we've been paring down and clearing out. These are the two play spaces we now have in our home. (I guess I should also mention Ada's doll closet in her room. I will get to that another day.). 

Why two?

Because the basement one doesn't get tons of use in the warmer months. In winter, we're down there a lot. So, it's worth having an extra area in the family room. It is also adjacent to my desk and workspace, which is helpful if I'm finishing a deadline, like today, and need the kids occupied.

Anyway, here they are after our clear out:

I wish I had snapped before photos. But I did this all on a very crazy nesting high. Basically, the living room benches had tons of random toys in them that would spill out all over the first level of our home. And the basement had two 9-cube organizers overflowing with toys and puzzles, blocks all over the ground, and a bunch of other multiples of things like dolls, puppets, and other assorted things the girls never played with.

Picture chaos.

Yeah.

That's it.

I have the highest hope for the cart in the living room, so I thought I'd show you what's in it. I have always complained about the age difference between my girls, but these toys seem to occupy them both nicely. And, OK. I'm not trying to drink the punch . . . but I'm getting more and more into Waldorf philosophies with regard to play and child-rearing.

I don't plan to follow all of it or send my kids to a specific Waldorf school (or homeschool, here's why). But I have always felt like organized sports/activities for younger kids and coached education from young ages . . . well, it just wasn't something I agreed with. Waldorf says kids need to play and explore and be exposed to the world without that type of structure. Toys are very open-ended and made from natural materials. Nature is priority. Seasons and holidays are to be celebrated with ritual. And predictable rhythm is so very important. I won't get into all the details right now, but it jibes with lots of stuff I've absentmindedly been striving for and is cool to see it in one place.

Here's where I'm starting in our home.

With the play cart.


This leads into another discussion and more explanation. But -- microblogging. Today I simply wanted to show you our spaces. We have so much less than we used to have. It might still be more than you care to have or you may -- instead -- feel like we don't have much. Who knows. Whatever the case, I'd love to gather questions or other directions you guys want me to take (the stuff you want to hear about) for the next post.

Leave a comment on the blog or on another platform so I can gather them! I will also discuss some of the homemade stuff we've put in the play cart to lower the price tag of all the expensive things you can buy. Because you can go crazy with Waldorf-style toys. They're gorgeous. But I cannot afford them. I digress!

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Why We Sold Most Our Toys

A child's job in the first several years of life is play. Naturally, parents and loved ones want to cultivate this important skill by providing plenty of interesting play-things to kids. Toys are also how we show affection and love, especially if gifts are our number one love language. There are countless beautifully organized playrooms you'll come across online that look like enchanted wonderlands. They're filled to the brim with organized bins of toys for every age and stage and season.

Thing is, in the almost seven years I've been a parent, I've grown to resent toys. I feel like a prisoner to them. First, I'll admit we're lucky to have the means to provide a good number of toys (and find them cleverly through second-hand shopping, etc.). And our kids have been the recipients of some very nice things over the years. But -- in the process -- we've amassed this huge collection. We've tried weeding. We've tried rotating. We're tried creating a sort of enchanted wonderland to encourage the critical skill of play.

What's been the result?

The kids ignore the toys most of the time. 

Except when they decide to throw them around.

We're left cleaning them out of every corner of the house. 

And the kids don't help.

Two of my simplification goals are to spend less time cleaning and to have my kids be more self-sufficient. So, this isn't going to work! I didn't plan it this way, but this post is going to be a three-parter.

In short: We decided to get rid of most of our toys last week. 

And my definition of "most" or "pared down" may be different from yours. In my eyes, what we did was quite radical, and it took me several years to work up the courage to make this step. After wading through a living room of toys, cleaning them up, and realizing that much of the stuff I'd been organizing had been played with very few times, I went to the local moms buy/sell/trade group and just started listing like a crazy person. Many of the items were snatched up within 10 minutes.

Other things, we took to the Salvation Army. And we're still finalizing the process today, as my basement looks like this:

What we're keeping:

• Play kitchen
• Play food
• Grocery cart
• Wooden register
• Mega Blocks
• Waffle Blocks
• Magnetic blocks
• Legos
• 3 baby dolls and a few accessories, like diapers and a couple outfits
• Ada's American Girl dolls + accessories
• A streamlined play cart that I'll get to later in the week
• Play doll house
• Musical instrument bin
• Sensory bean bin
• A set number of loved stuffed animals
• Fabric doll house for Ada
• Fabric Sesame Street doll house for Eloise
• A couple Sesame Street figures, puzzles, etc.

And I think that's mostly it. No, it isn't zero toys. It's not even just five toys or whatever minimalist goals I've run across other places online. But it's SO MUCH LESS than what we had. We had two 9-cube organizers that were bursting at the seams. They're both gone now and being used in other parts of the house as dressers. We had several large storage bins full of random toys. They're empty. We had a closet in the basement with leftover toys that didn't get much play -- it's empty.

What we got rid of was a lot and included several Little People play sets I had picked up second hand over the years. Many dolls that weren't getting any love. Tons of toys that were either broken or missing pieces. Lots of Barbies, Disney princess, and other character type toys that don't totally meet our interests. Gosh, there's a lot more and this process is continuing today, so I hope to share a fuller list on my next post (and edit down the keep list above), as well as how I sold or got rid of them. I've made nearly $200 in the last week, which is great.

How many toys do we hope to end up with? That's hard to say. I am thinking even fewer than we're keeping now. I feel that what we've done is just the first step, but already the girls are responding well. So, yeah. This is a huge topic. I'll devote the week to it, but if I get too in-depth today . . . I'll get bogged down and never publish!

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Aldi // Foods Picky Toddlers + Kids

I get lots of questions about my favorite Aldi foods. So, today I thought I'd give you guys a quick post about what foods I get for Ada and Eloise. Ada's pretty good about trying new things and getting at least some variety. Eloise, on the other hand, is asserting her toddler independence and is a super picky eater, so it's a challenge finding things she will try and potentially love.

As I have mentioned in the past, we are raising our children vegetarian, so the foods I'll be mentioning are all vegetarian or vegan-friendly. Here's what's in our pantry right now. We have actually eaten through a good chunk of what I bought last week (we adults snack on a lot of these foods, too)!

In no particular order.

• Simply Nature White Cheddar Puffs
• Clancy's Veggie Straws
• Pretzel sticks
• Multigrain tortilla chips
• Graham crackers
• Simply Nature Fruit Squeezes
• Fruit + Veggie Pouches (we used these when E was a baby)
• Eggs
• Milk
• Rolled oats (for making homemade snacks)
• Fresh bulk produce, especially when it's local and in-season
• Freeze Dried Strawberries 
• Plain nuts and various trail mixes
• Lookin' Sharp Granola
• Little Journey Yogurt Bites
• Happy Farms cheese sticks, in bulk when possible
• Hummus, various flavors -- but my kids like plain best
• Guacamole
• Yogurt tubes and pouches
• Organic canned beans
• Simply Nature Organic Mac + Cheese
• Simply Nature Organic Frozen Fruit Bars
• Rainbow organic baby carrots
• Broccoli slaw
• Avocados
• Clementine oranges
• (I realize I mentioned produce, but those are some favorites)
• Frozen peas
• Coconut water, mix in with plain water in a 1/3 to 2/3 ratio
• Sparkling water, Ada doesn't like but Eloise LOVES
• Simply Nature Organic Juice Boxes
• Breakfast Best French Toast Sticks
• Simply Nature Organic Apple Instant Oatmeal
• Organic pasta
• Organic pasta sauces

I provided links where they were easy find with a quick Google search. Otherwise, we just get whatever they have at the store. It's usually just one brand for a lot of the things I didn't link. Occasionally you'll come across store brands at good deals, like LaCroix, so we do take advantage of those.

Here's an example of an all-Aldi nibble tray I made for Eloise this week.

Some kid stuff we don't tend to buy at Aldi include things like peanut butter, bread, frozen fruit, granola bars, and gummies. It's not that we don't like the Aldi brand, we're just able to buy larger quantities for less money elsewhere (like Sam's or Wegman's store brand). I thought it would be good to include a list of things the girls DON'T like from Aldi, but honestly . . . they pretty much eat everything we've bought. So, now I'm wondering why I called Eloise picky!

Scratch that. We DO NOT like Aldi bananas. They are always green at the store and either don't ripen OR they get REALLY weirdly mushy. My girls love bananas, so we buy them at Wegman's (we also get our non-dairy milk, tofu, and a few other items, like large jars of peanut butter there).

Oh, and if you're curious about how we organize our kid plates, etc.

While writing this post, I also discovered that Aldi has a section on its website with snack recipes using their products! And I am also sure I'm missing a whole swath of things I usually buy. Be sure to share your favorites in the comments!

Also: I need to update my Vegetarian Staples at Aldi post! They have so many more options since the last time I wrote about it. Still no tofu, though. Boo!

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DIY Mermaid Sensory Board

We have a children's space totally dedicated to sensory play where I live. It has all sorts of cool things to touch and see. One of my favorites has always been these little frames filled with that mermaid flip sequin fabric. I don't think that's what it's called, but you get me. They are around six inches to a foot in size and are anchored to the walls for kids to play with.

Naturally, I wanted to bring this idea home.

In a BIG way . . .

I actually bought the fabric for this project before Christmas and just never got around to finishing it. Not that it takes long at all. And I kind of winged the execution, so this "tutorial" is more of a "see what I did, try it and maybe improve upon my method" kind of thing. In its current iteration, it works great. But I'm sure it could be refined.

First, you need your sequin fabric. I bought mine on Amazon, though I'm sure you may be able to find this stuff at your local craft shop. I chose the classic mermaid blue/green and black. It comes in an impressive array of shades, though, so you could get this to match any decor. You know, because this will be living in your living room, most likely.

So, a yard is 36" x 47". Massive.


All I did with the fabric is stretch + mount it inside a cheap plastic poster frame I had bought at Target eons ago. So, for me this project only cost the amount of the fabric. You can get a similar frame for around $10-$15. Alternatively, you could also put the fabric on the wall and then frame around it with wood trim, if you are extra handy.

There really was no trick to stretching it. I just placed the clear plastic frame insert (that would go over the poster) in the center of my fabric. I pulled the fabric taught around it and folded the extra pieces flat. I then put it in the frame and put the backing of the frame over top of the folded pieces. Then I pressed down all those tabs on the back of the frame to keep everything in place.

Note: Keeping the folded pieces there wasn't just laziness -- it helps hold everything tight. You could also cut the fabric to size and glue it to the clear insert. I'm sure there are many ways that would work.

And then we got to playing:


Again, this isn't a very technical tutorial. Ada and Eloise love this thing equally. And it's big enough that they can both play with it at the same time. I think we'll end up putting it in the play room, attached to the wall. But it's also nice to place on a table or the floor.

Oh! If you don't feel like going to all this trouble or spending much money, you can also get those sequin fabric pillows to toss about. They're super fun, too. And most cost around $7. Boom!

Let me know if you try this project! I was incredibly surprised how easily it came together.

HAPPY FRIDAY!

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Last-Minute Gifts // My Real-Life Suggestions

I am not going to make any huge adult gift list this year. But I will share a few things Stephen and I are actually getting under the tree. (Not TOTALLY done shopping yet!) I headed out to browse at physical stores over the weekend and was overwhelmed with traffic, parking, etc. So, this is all stuff you can find on Amazon if you're doing things last-minute and want to avoid the crowds.

I'd rather bake and decorate cookies.

Ashley

• Cat Draft Stopper. I shared this idea a few years ago and finally took the plunge this year. It arrived yesterday, and it's AWESOME. I can't wait for the girls to see it. And for it to block that draft by the front door.
• KOZiKICKS Slippers. I'm a sucker for a good Shark Tank product. I couldn't resist these when I actually saw them in the store. They are really comfortable and seem extremely well made.
• Spinning Vanity Organizer. Woohoo. Exciting! No, really. My mom got one of these recently, and she said it was life-changing. LOL. I'm hoping it'll help tame the clutter.
• New Robe. There's a theme here, I guess. Things to be cozy. I haven't decided on exactly which robe, but it has to be really warm and hopefully have sherpa on it.
• Aromatherapy Necklace. I've wanted one of these for a while. I don't do tons of oils, but I do like the scent on me from time to time, especially lavendar or balsam fir. Yes. I like to smell like a Christmas tree.

Stephen

• Yaktrax. Stephen is a trooper and runs even when it's super slick outside. We both use our running snowshoes when the powder really accumulates. But I thought these would be helpful if it's icy, which often happens.
• Fandango Gift Card. Since we don't have family around, Stephen and I often don't go on dates. Well, at least together. We each love going to the movies, so I got Stephen a Fandango gift card. They come in varying amounts, but I just did $25 -- enough for about three movies/matinee.
• Carharrt Hat. You can never have too many of these hats. We steal them from one another and sometimes can't find them when we need them, so I got a backup to the two we already have. 
• Guitar Stuff. Stephen actually picked out his own gear, and I have no idea what he chose. I know he got a distortion pedal for his electric. Anyway, gear for their favorite hobby is usually a safe bet!
• Power Bank. He's wanted one of these external iPhone batteries for a while. Honestly, I sort of want one, too.

Girls

Here are a few things I got for the girls to fill in the gaps, so to speak. Since I did my shopping early, there have been just a few things I've wanted to get since then. Mostly, the girls have both taken to playing with the toy kitchen. Together! It's awesome. But Ada's stash of play food has dwindled over the years.

I got them:

• Melissa + Doug can food set. You can open the cans and they're under $10 shipped free with Prime.
• Melissa + Doug snack food set. You can put the little pretzels, popcorn, and cookies in resealable fabric bags.
• Melissa + Doug sip and tip set. A set of juice bottles that you can pretend to drink. Tip and the liquid disappears.

Family

Alright, so this one is something I saw and thought could have gone one of two ways. First, it could have been a really stupid flop. Or, alternatively, it could be AMAZING. I was unable to contain myself, so I gave our family this gift over the weekend. AND IT WAS A HUGE, MASSIVE HIT.

What is it? An Indoor Snowball Fight kit. 

I know, I know. Ridiculous.

But you basically get all these large white pom balls that feel like real snow compacting when you squish them. There's no secret, you just throw them at one another. We have literally played this for hours already (Ada begged to play before school today), and I've recommended it to all my friends. It's a good way to get moving indoors when it's extremely cold (it "feels like" 0 degrees F here today).

More gift lists

And if you'd like to look back at my suggestions from previous years, have at it! I stand by everything I've posted. In fact, I still use those ideas today. Like I said, I finally bought that cat draft stopper, and I couldn't be happier.

• 30 Gifts for $30 or Less // Gents
• 30 Gifts for $30 or Less // Ladies
• 30 Gifts for $30 or Less // Kids
• 30 Gifts for $30 or Less // Babies
• 2017 Kids Gift List (What Ada + Eloise are getting)

PS: Don't forget to check out my Christmas messy house tour.

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Christmas 2017 // Kid Gifts

So, what are we getting the girls for Christmas? I actually have all my shopping done for them already. Say what?! You may know that I'm always a late shopper, and I wanted it off my plate early this year. Here is a list of the things they are actually getting or that we already own -- not just stuff I think would be cool and that I don't intend to buy.

// 1: Play Silks

I bought two of Sarah’s enchanted play silks -- one in rainbow and the other in blossom. I love how they could be used for anything from dress-up to fort-making. Open-ended play items are my favorite because they foster so much creativity . . . and they don’t require batteries!

I had alternatively considered buying the girls a set of these polyester play cloths. They’re a bit less expensive but have good reviews. In the end, I got roped in by the fun blend of colors.


// 2: Hanging Pod

As a joint gift from Santa, the girls are getting a hanging pod swing for the basement. I’ve seen these so many places, but I found one that is a cotton canvas on Amazon for just $23. It got good reviews and can hold up to 170 pounds, so anyone in the house can use it. We’re going to hang it in the basement from a beam.




// 3: Play Tent, etc.

As another joint gift, I purchased a new pop-up play tent in the shape of a castle. I like how it's sort of gender-neutral (a lot of them were pink and purple). It's 53' tall, so even Ada will be able to stand inside of it. The best part is that it folds away easily and can be toted around the house because it's so light.

Oh, and I got them this pack of felt crowns to share on their adventures.



// 4: Mermaid Sensory Board

As yet another joined gift, I bought a yard of sequin mermaid fabric and I'm going to make a large sensory board (by fixing it to either a large cork board we have or maybe using a frame) with it so the girls can draw and play. We saw this at a local children's museum, and I immediately thought it would be an awesome idea!


// 5: Plush Toys

Then Ada's getting a stuffed bear made with alpaca fur that we bought at a festival in my hometown.

Eloise is getting a stuffed llama because llamas are her favorite.



// 6: Girl Gifts To Each Other

The girls got each other gifts as well. Ada got Eloise a set of plush donuts (she has a thing with donuts) for the play kitchen. Eloise "got" Ada the game Pie Face. I'm thinking that one will be fun when the whole family is visiting at Christmas.


// 7: Name Puzzle

I got Eloise a personalized name puzzle for her birthday, but it didn’t arrive on time so I saved it for Christmas. I figure this is a nice, heirloom sort of gift. I also just love her name.


// 8: Art Stuff

I love the idea of giving things that the kids will really use, and they always need art supplies. For Eloise, I picked up some of these beeswax crayons. They’re rectangular, so perfect for little hands. I looked through a variety of brands and these seem to get good marks for quality and price.

I am also getting some watercoloring supplies for both girls. A nice big pad of paper and a huge set of colors.


// 9: Magnet Blocks

While we already own these, I highly recommend magnetic blocks of some kind. We’re a Magformers family. I love how they are perfect for big and little hands. We build things with them but also make pictures on the refrigerator. They may be the toy that’s most often picked out of everything in the box.


// 10: Dolls

I bought a cute cloth doll by HABA for Ada years ago . . . and I never gave it to her. I set it aside as a gift for a future child. So, Eloise is getting the doll this year along with a sleep outfit for her. Or him. The one we have is quite androgynous, which is actually kind of nice.


// 11: More Dolls

What’s Ada’s big gift? Well, it’s something I didn’t expect to buy -- but she really (REALLY) wanted it. So, it’ll end up being a joint gift from me and my grandparents (they always give us money). I tracked down one of those Luvabella dolls this summer. I didn’t pay the crazy prices they’re going for now. It’s got AI and crazy robotics stuff going on. Kind of creepy, but she’s obsessed.

This list is almost complete, but there are a couple other items I got second hand that I intend to write about in the next week or two. I have some stocking stuffers I’ll be sure to share in that post as well. I’ll also be back soon with some gift lists for the men and women in your lives. Stephen and I aren’t getting much this year. Our recent furnace repair took care of that for us.

But I hope to post a bit about our Thanksgiving menu tomorrow. Maybe? My kids have been sick. It’s no fun at all. I’ve mostly been focusing on my freelance work, so I do apologize for neglecting the blog.

Happy Tuesday -- I’m off to Ada’s first choir concert!

Note: These are linked to Amazon, so if you purchase through the link I get a (very) small kickback. 
Thanks for supporting the blog for all these years!

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Instant Gratification // Musings

Growing up in a small town before the internet became a big deal, I generally accepted that items I wanted/needed would take weeks to arrive and that most things I wanted/needed to do would close by 5PM.

It was a time of slow living. Simplicity.

There was no such thing as instant gratification. I remember browsing through the movie store, for example, looking at VHS after VHS. Finally, I’d arrive on the movie I wanted to see . . . only to find that all copies were checked out and I’d have to wait at least another week to see it.

24-hour grocery stores

Streaming television/movies

Amazon Prime’s shipping

Walk-in clinics open on Sundays

It sounds silly, but these things amaze me. They still do even years after first being exposed to them. I remember leaving home to go to college in Ithaca, which isn’t some big metropolis, and getting delivery calzones at 2AM. Can you imagine! That’s the middle of the night, and I could have hot food brought to me while I was in my pajamas. We won’t even go into the freshly baked cookies you could get at that hour. I’d sometimes drive to Wegmans just to walk around the empty store at midnight because I found the whole novelty of it just so incredible.

Small town girl right here. That’s me. Born and raised. Fifth generation, too. But life is so different now. And this applies even to my small hometown. I cannot even begin to tell you how Amazon would have changed my life. If a store didn’t have X, Y, or Z that you needed . . . we still joke that the owner would say “well -- long exhale -- we can order it in” and it would take seemingly weeks to arrive. As if by horse or something.

But, 2017. We can have basically anything we want, whenever we want it. Sure, some things are still more difficult to get. (Polar’s Unicorn Kisses sparkling water, anyone? Which, by the way, I found here!) And there are times when demand is high. Instant gratification is a great thing -- at least sometimes.

Lately, though, I’ve been grappling with how to bring up my girls in an age when they have access to so much. (PS: Has anyone read Raising Grateful Kids in an Entitled World? Wondering if it’s worth adding to the library list.)

I would love for them to feel that immense satisfaction of when you have waited so very long for something. It’s this painful place -- the waiting. I think it’s important. For one, it makes the reward so much sweeter. I feel like we’re missing that so much these days. Not that I want to give up any of it. Nope. I’ve become far too accustomed.

But I feel like always getting what we want (even if it’s just immediate rental of a movie) leads to this feeling that we NEED/WANT so much more. We’re ever-addicted to the feeling of joy, however fleeting it may be. And to rarely if ever have that waiting? I just wonder what that does to a person and his/her expectations out of life.

I feel like a lot of my homesteading efforts are also efforts to recapture those old times when things didn’t come so easy. To get that whole feeling of fulfillment and satisfaction again. Many of you were so kind to point out that convenience (from my last post) isn’t always such a bad thing. I totally agree with you.

When most everything is made for our convenience, I’m not so sure. But here I am today with another one of those aimless, thought-circling posts. I’ve been thinking a lot lately, so I suppose it’s good I’ve had time for that.

I’ll be back soon with some new meals that we’ve been making! Meal planning is much easier when you brach out and get excited about new recipes, right?!

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What to Expect When Your Child Goes to Kindergarten

A lot of my fellow 2011/2012 moms are currently filling out paperwork and visiting school open houses in preparation for next year's big move -- kindergarten. I've written about how we live in New York where the age cutoff is December 1. We went back and forth on exactly what to do with Ada.

• Delay preschool/school from the start (she was SO ready at age 3 for preschool!). 
• Another year of pre-K (not in the budget)? 
• Homeschool her for a year (with working from home + infant -- nope). 
• Put her in full kindergarten (I had misgivings due to the schedule, etc).

Looking back, I spent so much time worried about this topic.


When Ada went off to school full time in the fall, I experienced a wild mix of emotions. On one hand, I felt apprehensive about sending a four-year-old off on the bus each morning. I was thrilled she got into the early kindergarten program, somewhat delaying her entrance into the public school system by a year, while also not delaying it at all. (It's a unique offering in our district -- higher level than pre-K, but less demanding than K.) Still, it was a lot going from the summers together to not seeing her between the hours of 8AM and 4PM.

Slowly this routine has become the new normal. It's even worked out quite well now that we have baby sister at home. Ada loves her teacher. She loves her classmates. She loves her school. It's an awesome school. I can't say enough good things. We moved when she was just two specifically to get into this district out of all the districts in our area. When it comes to school, I was just like her. Very eager to be around my friends, learn new things, and just be out in the world. So, while I miss her -- incredibly at times -- I am also happy to know she's happy.

I see it, too. She's different. She's been learning so much being away, being more independent. She's grown tremendously as a result. Sure, there are times when her sensitive nature get the best of her. I think that happens to any kid. But she's confident. She likes her thoughts to be heard -- to share her ever-growing knowledge of what the world is all about. It's exciting to see. It fills me (and Stephen) with a lot of pride. We made this kid, and she's turning out to be fantastically funny, bright, and empathetic.

(She can also read, write, and do all other kinds of nifty things, like mix primary colors to make new colors -- her favorite new project. I don't mean to diminish the academics in this discussion. I am blown away with everything she has learned in such a short time. But -- honestly -- so much of this first year is about the transition. The social and emotional aspects. Fostering confidence and all that jazz.)

But then there are these times when my heart aches beyond aching. She's been having issues with a boy on her bus who's taken to harassing her every. single. day. He even followed her around on the playground yesterday just to bug her. There have been times when I've seen her heart sink because she was so overly excited to tell a friend about, for example, her pierced ears . . . only to have the friend shrug and say effectively, "who cares?" This little bubble I so carefully put her in is slowly weakening. Every situation brings out this inner mama bear mode I didn't know I had.

And -- yes -- I think she'd still be napping two hours a day if she were home with me. She can get extremely tired on the long days, and I feel guilt because so many people I know still have their 2011 babies home. There are times when I hear some new word or phrase I may not want to hear. Or sometimes there's an issue I feel like she's not ready to confront, and I'll try to redirect. It's just a whole bunch of complex stuff . . . and I never quite know what questions the day will bring.

What wisdom can I share about being a new-ish mom to a school-aged kid? Like everything else in life, this is a totally new season. Get ready for it. Your child will probably have things about school that he loves and hates (Ada doesn't love P.E. and can get somewhat upset if it's that day -- like sick-to-stomach). There will also be times when you'll feel so crushed that she has to navigate the cold, scary world (errr, or playground) on her own. You'll likely be shocked at some of the stuff he has heard from other kids. You'll also likely be saddened when you pick up stuff about the lives of other kids that maybe don't have the most supportive home environments.

Most of all, though, you'll get through it. You'll somehow learn how to cope and help your kid with this new phase. I know some of you gals are probably worried. Or maybe you're excited. There's a lot to look forward to. Ada wears her school sweatshirt with pride. She knows people that I don't know. She sees teachers, staff, and friends out and about and gets super excited because she now has her own little world. Oh, that's another cool thing. There is now a whole group of people who care about your child. The teachers and helpers and other parents -- they all care so much. And you end up loving this new village.

When school starts, it starts. From there, everything keeps spinning -- sometimes at a dizzying pace -- and we just go with it. Time, unfortunately, isn't stopping anytime soon. If anything, it is moving faster than ever. Instead of resisting it, I eagerly await learning what each new day brings. I most look forward to that moment when my big girl gets off the bus each afternoon. It's certainly become the golden hour in our home.

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Five Year Age Gap // Video

I had some time yesterday to sit down and share some thoughts on what it's like to have two kids who are nearly 5 years apart in age. Well, they're actually 4 years and 7 months apart almost to the day. It's a question we actually get quite often when we're out and about. I don't really feel like it's a gigantic gap, but it seems to rouse some commentary.

Anyway, here's the video!



Larger age gap benefits:

• Older kid is independent
• Older kid can help with a lot
• Both children get lots of one-on-one time (yay naps!)
• One child is at school, so it's easier to work from home
• Only one in diapers
• No need for double gear

Larger age gap disadvantages:

• Not at same stage, different areas of needs
• Out of  practice with baby stuff
• Hard to return to sleepless nights
• Two sets of toys for different ages (small pieces! EEK!)
• Need to respond to needs of little sometimes before helping bigger kid
• Some items like car seats are expired and can't be reused

I probably missed some stuff. But that's the gist. I hope this is helpful whether you're considering a larger age gap between your kids or simply finding yourself in this spot due to stuff you cannot control. We're thrilled to have both of our girls -- no matter their ages. And if we do choose to have another kid (I chat about that in the video -- we are still undecided, just trying on the idea!), we'll be happy whenever he or she comes.

By the way, I am working on getting my videos to be better quality. I think I finally achieved the best I can do with my iPhone. Be sure to check out my YouTube channel to subscribe if you like these videos. And if there's anything you'd like to see me chat about, also let me know in the comments or maybe on Instagram.

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Minimalist Kids Room Tour

Happy Wednesday, friends! I've been meaning to do a new + improved full house tour for over a year. (Here's the latest one from two years ago. And our first house tour, if you're interested.) We have definitely pared down and taken on a more minimalistic approach in most every room (the old living room shocks me!). But with different house projects we're doing, walls that are still only 3/4 painted, etc., it's been hard for me to go through the entire space.

I figured maybe doing a room-by-room tour would be the way to go. And what better place to start than the room that started a lot of my desire to be more minimal -- Ada's bedroom. Yup. Ada had probably more clothes than everyone else in the house combined. It was taking so much energy and time to put everything away. Same with stuffed animals, toys, and general clutter.

Here's the tour:




And here are some photos if you can't view the tour until later.

For reference, here's Ada's room before we leaned it out. It looks deceivingly organized and clean. But having the bed at a loft invited all kinds of clutter. She had tons of clothes in the closet that often sat in heaps on the floor waiting to be put away.

You may be asking: "Well, doesn't she need a desk?" and "What about toys?" Totally understand. In our old house, we wouldn't have been able to keep her bedroom quite this clear. We have most of the toys -- including her art desk -- in the basement. But that's a tour for another day. I wanted to keep the bedroom space mostly for sleeping. I think creating calm helps children feel safe and sleep better

Anyway, I hope to write another post in the future with some tips I can share about paring down your kid's wardrobe. It's been the biggest help in this space. It has also helped the morning routine incredibly by cutting a lot of time out (clothing decisions are serious business here!).

Pssst: Don't forget to SUBSCRIBE to my YouTube channel to see these types of videos before they hit the blog!

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Mommy + Me Meals // Slow Cooker Soup

This post from my old family blog is just about two years old. It's still one of my favorite food tricks if Ada's being picky! And I actually think I may make slow cooker soup or chili tonight for dinner. Yum!

I must admit that as Ada nears age 3, she’s been much more adventurous with her eats. Some of her new favorites? Black olives and roasted beets. Stephen opened a can of olives to toss onto our pasta dinner one night, and we heard a little: “Whadder doze?” And the rest is history.

Still, assembled meals allude us. So, I needed a way to get Ada to eat what we were eating now that it’s fall. Why does that matter? I make my many slow cooker soups, and she just wasn’t interested -- in any of them. Rather than make a completely separate meal (which is what we’ve done for far too long), I got this sort of weird and wonderful idea.

It’s Soup and Not Soup

For this particular slow cooker soup, I made a batch of this delicious Whole Foods recipe, but instead of red beans -- I used a mix of black and pinto. Instead of red rice, I used brown. I skipped the greens.  I tossed in some salsa and pumpkin puree for wet ingredients versus the wine. And then instead of cooking it on the stovetop, I simmered for several hours in the slow cooker (after the beans had soaked in water overnight).

You get the idea. Keep it loose, use what you have, and improvise.

I like to serve chunky soups and stews with cheese, so that’s why you see that in the mix. The olives were added because Ada likes them. And you see some canned black beans on Ada’s plate -- that’s because she’s only now starting to like rehydrated beans. They are ever-so slightly tougher and less salty . . . so the canned are like the gateway beans on her plate.

Here’s a closer look:


And that’s right. This is the same meal, though it looks quite different, right? The strange part: I strained Ada’s beans and rice versus serving them in soup form. I tried soup first just to see, but she turned her nose. This is much the same nutrition, minus the goop.

You can either use a slotted spoon to do the work. Really picky kids might need light rinse in the colander. Since I’d eventually hope Ada will enjoy some soup, I am going to keep trying to serve it to her in its original form before going to these measures. But we do what we need to do. It’s better than admitting defeat and serving yet another PB+J.



She was skeptical at first, but ended up eating the whole thing (plus an apple)! I’m absolutely thrilled to see Ada trying new foods. I’m going to continue to encourage it, but also keep following her lead. Thanks for you patience with this post -- I know some of you had been looking forward to it for over a week!

Have you made any good mommy + me meals lately?

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DIY Craft Kits for Kids

I'm going to start moving some posts from our old family blog over to (never)homemaker. We had a lot of goodies in there -- so I don't want them to fade away. If you want to know more about why we closed that blog, click here.

I keep seeing those clever + colorful craft boxes popping up on blogs and sidebar ads. I mean, they're cute and all, but I just can't see allocating that type of money for an activity -- art -- that can be so simple an inexpensive. And at Ada's age, I also don't care to follow directions. It's all about exploration and expression. Imagination.

Still, I see value in thinking ahead of time to plan an activity versus letting it become a chaotic mess. (Well -- let's be honest -- crafting with young preschoolers is a recipe for a mess!) So, I decided to try out a few of my own DIY craft boxes.

// DIY CRAFT KITS

First: I don't think these produce containers are perfect for this purpose. Any leftover small boxes or zip bags might hold more stuff and contain it better. In the future, I'll go for function over form in this regard. These collections of goodies aren't the whole story either. The idea is that I'll pull out a box along with our collection of assorted paper so Ada can make whatever her little heart desires.

Let's dive in and see what we're got.


The BLUE BOX: 

Ada knows her basic colors by now, but I think it's fun to focus on one color and its various shades. I just put in everything I could find that was blue in our supplies. I'll probably give her a glue bottle for the sparkles and help out with teaching her how to cut shapes out of paper with the plastic scissors (they work surprisingly well!).


The RAINBOW BOX: 

Markers, stickers, and even balloons! This box is bursting with all the colors of the rainbow, as well as a couple simple "stencils" (Play-Dough cutouts) to try out tracing. I can see pulling out a huge piece of paper and drawing big shapes to color in and stick with the stickers. Oh, and those stickers you can color yourself are really fun!


The STICKS + STONES BOX:

This collection is all about touch and feel. Popsicle sticks are fun for a variety of activities. The wooden beads will be fun to glue. And what kid doesn't love Googly eyes? I picture us cutting out shapes from thick card stock, glueing to the sticks and making tiny masks or something like that.


The DOT BOX:

My friend Leslie introduced me to these gigantic dot markers, and Ada's hooked. We practice writing numbers (in dot form) and drawing pictures. Or just having fun. Some crayons for coloring and plastic scissors. The glue stick is one of Ada's favorites. Cutting bits of paper and pasting to a larger base is always fun. Don't forget the Mr. Sketch smelly markers!


The PAINT BOX:

Pretty basic, right? Just a collection of Crayola Washable Paint and a big brush. What you paint is up to you. We've been trekking to our backyard creek to collect flat rocks for painting lately -- Ada can't get enough!

// SUMMARY

As you can see, there's nothing particularly smart or creative or mind-blowing about the groupings of these craft supplies. But by dividing them out into little containers, your kid will get 10,000 times more excited to create something. You also give them the power of choice.

And don't worry, most young kids don't care if they actually MAKE something that resembles anything in real life. The fun is in the process, not the product!


Like what you just read? Browse more of our posts + recipes on Pinterest. You can subscribe to the feed of these posts, chat with us on Twitter or Facebook. And you can always email us with your questions and comments.

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5-Minute DIY Glitter Slime

I cannot believe how much Ada enjoyed this slime making project, you guys. I wasn't even planning to share it on the blog -- but she has been captivated AND it was so incredibly easy to make. Of course, I need to first mention that -- no -- this recipe isn't my own. There are so many slimes and doh recipes out there on Pinterest, right? Why reinvent the wheel?

We followed these instructions on Gillian Bower's YouTube channel and got amazing results. Others we had tried in the past were too hard or sticky. Or they used regular glue with the addition of glitter and just simply didn't turn out as well. The key is using glitter glue from the start. It comes in so many different colors. The rest is all about not adding too much borax.

DIY SLIME

What you need:

• 1/2 cup glitter glue
• 1/2 cup water
• 1 (scant) teaspoon borax
• 1 cup water
• Whisk, spoon, bowl, etc.

Method . . .

Pour 1/2 cup glitter glue and 1/2 cup water into a bowl and whisk until fully incorporated.


Then mix the borax and cup of water together. Very, very slowly stir some of this into the glue mixture. Maybe a tablespoon at a time. You will have most of the water + borax left, but you can use it to make another batch it you want.

(And -- according to Ada -- we are making more today...)


When the spoon stops working, just pick it up with your hands and knead until it stops sticking. It takes only a few minutes. You can add more borax + water if it is too sticky, but try to find the perfect balance or it'll get too hard.

It's a delicate process.


Once it feels like the slime you know and love, hand it over to your kid for seriously HOURS of enjoyment. We store ours in a zip top bag at the moment. But anything air-tight should do just fine.


That was easy, right?!


What's your favorite DIY slime, doh, or putty recipe?

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